Parents Live Rent Free With Daughter and Husband, Son-in-law Worries About Becoming Family Financial Support System

Ally Perry • Writer and Editor

Jun 30, 2026 7:45 AM EDT

Is family always obligated to help family when it comes to money?

One of the most important parts of cultivating a good relationship with your relatives is that it offers both you and them a support system to lean on in times of need. We are often told that contributing to a community is an important part of living a good life, and in a lot of cases, that is going to start with our extended family.

There is no denying it: being the one who is depended on for something by a relative is often inconvenient or annoying. However, it is the kind of thing that decent people do for those whom they love. The most important issue is where to draw the line and what boundaries need to be laid out. It is also an unfortunate truth that some people will take advantage of family generosity to the extent that it becomes a problem.

In-law relationships can be something that is strained at the best of times, and if you have to help them out in some way, that can be emphasized even more. It isn't always a bad thing, but it is vital to understand when help is and isn't appropriate.

via Keith Tanner

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A man and his wife had allowed his in-laws to live with them and their infant son for the last year and a half without paying rent. In some ways, the arrangement worked well because his mother-in-law could babysit, but he was also worried that there would be increasing demands from them and his wife's siblings to financially support them.
He was worried that he and his wife would not be able to plan for their own future if they felt like they needed to help out her family, but the suggestion offended her. He wasn't sure if his doubts put him in the wrong.
Am I wrong for being concerned that my wife and I will become the default financial support system for her family?

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