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    Dad buys a new TV for himself, passes it off as a Mother's Day gift for his wife: 'He said I was a hysterical woman after I called him out.'

    What is his problem?

    In my family, we have this concept called a "rubber snake." A rubber snake gift is something that you want for yourself, but you buy for somebody else as a gift. The term comes from a friend of my uncle's, who got his dad a rubber snake as a gift when he was a little kid. His dad could obviously tell that his son wanted the rubber snake more than he did, so he said, "Wow, a rubber snake! I love it! Do you want it?" And ever since, the term has stuck. I've been trying for years to spread the word about rubber snake gifts, but it's harder to make slang happen than you'd think.

    A kid giving their parents a rubber snake can be cute. But a husband giving a rubber snake gift to his wife, especially for Mother's Day, is totally unacceptable. The husband in this story tried to do just that to his wife, and she was rightfully annoyed with him.

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    • Handsome man holding a remote control and laughing while sitting on the sofa at home
      via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

      A dad happily watches a movie on his brand-new TV, which he allegedly bought for Mother's Day, even though everyone in the family knows it's for him.

      Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    • Am I the bad guy for pushing back on husband who tried to pass off a gift for himself as a Mother's Day gift for me?

      My husband loves big TVs. I don't really care. We have a 50 inch that is older but works well enough for me. We're sitting on the couch and my kids wants to blast something from his phone to the TV, and it's not
      via u/Shayntastic
    • working. So I say, "meh we probably need a new TV", and my husband says, "we could get one this weekend, that could be your Mother's Day gift!"
      via u/Shayntastic
    • Flat screen TV displaying black screen
      via Andres Jasso

      A new flat screen TV in the living room. 

      Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    • So I push back. "Don't disguise a gift for yourself as a Mother's Day gift, dude. That's f ed up".
      via u/Shayntastic
    • A woman sitting on the floor with her hands in the air
      via Blake Cheek (Unsplash+)

      Mom criticizes her husband for wanting to buy a Mother's Day gift that's really for him.

      Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    • And he just starts fighting back, saying g he already got me something, this was in addition, and that I'm acting like an ah le.
      via u/Shayntastic
    • It escalated to him saying I'm a "hysterical woman", and I put words in his mouth, and that he won't let me walk all over him.
      via u/Shayntastic
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    • He's a great man. But lordie he can never be wrong. A simple, "yeah, you're right. We could get a TV, but it's not a Mother's Day gift" would have been the right move here, but he needed to win the argument and have the last word.
      via u/Shayntastic
    • My kid went upstairs rather than listen to this BS. I went up, too. I don't need this crop. So... who is the a_h_le here?
      via u/Shayntastic
    • DelawareMom Years ago, I had a neighbor whose husband bought her a w d whacker for Mother's Day. For Father's Day, he received a string of pearls. Awesome!
      via u/DelawareMom
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    • iamsnarky My friend's husband bought her a chainsaw and 2 additional batteries for her birthday. So she never had to stop working on cutting up the fallen trees! He thought he was giving the best gift. We all were waiting to know if he got chopped up. She did tell him he could do it, but he's in a wheelchair soooo.... she ended up buying him a kayak a few months later for a different holiday and he was pretty bitter.
      via u/iamsnarky
    • Cuckdreams 1190 My brother and I got my mom a tool box and filled it with all the tools necessary to do basic stuff around the house. We thought it was genius. We were also in our teens. That being said, she still uses the tools today, 20 years later. It was a good gift, just not a good mothersday gift. It should have been one of those "I know you need this" gifts that you get someone randomly.
      via u/Cuckdreams1190
    • idk2929 I am a mom. If my kids were to put this much thought and effort into a gift all on their own, I would genuinely love it, whatever it is. However, that same exact gift from my husband would be upsetting. The intention and context are important.
      via u/idk2929
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    • Commission Extra8240 You should get yourself diamond earrings as a Father's Day gift for him.
      via u/CommissionExtra8240
    • Shayntastic OP I literally LOL'd at this. Good move. I'll give it 10 more minutes and head down and let him know.
      via u/Shayntastic
    • Yep215 He called you a "hysterical woman" but you're still calling him a "great man?" Nah
      via u/Yep215
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    • Loose-Chemical-4982 Yeah the disconnect there is wild. A great man doesn't do sh like that, esp in front of his kids
      via u/Loose-Chemical-4982
    • aglc17 The misogynistic "hysterical woman" comment is (to me) much worse than the original issue.
      via u/aglc17
    • swadx001 Post like these reminds me of why I chose the blissfull life of a single
      via u/swadx001
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    • Sometimes, life is just easier when you only have to rely on yourself for your own happiness. If you don't have a partner, then you don't have anyone who can disappoint you like this. The only person who can disappoint you to this degree is yourself, and at least you have control of yourself. But women shouldn't have to forgo relationships because men are so disappointing most of the time. 

    • atxtrace NTA but he's not a great man or a great father. Great husbands and fathers don't verbally a , harass, demean their wives especially in front of their kids. Your poor kid going to his room to avoid he meltdown is so sad. Kids learn what they live which doesn't bode well for his future. Your husband is gross. The things he said were gross. There is zero way this is the first mantrum he's thrown either.
      via u/atxtrace

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    Tags

    fathers day marriage kids mothers day relationships dad argument mom television
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