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Woman refuses to visit her Mississippi in-laws because it's 80 degrees inside their house in the summer, sparks debate when she suggests an alternative: ‘It's unbearable; I do not sleep'

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  • [I refuse] to visit in laws bc of house temp

    My (36F) husband's (37M) family lives out of state. We are in the DC area and they live in southern Mississippi.
  • Every summer, we spend two weeks visiting. My in laws are great, except for one thing.
  • They keep their house (in the summer) at 80 degrees. It's unbearable. I do not sleep. It makes me nauseous. If I try to ask for more AC, they oblige for 10 minutes then complain about being too cold.
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  • My husband is also miserable, but he deals with it. Tonight, I told him he's more than welcome to visit this summer, but I will not be
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  • joining him. It's not relaxing for me. I do not want to use my vacation time to be miserable for two weeks.
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  • He got upset and said spending time with his family and his wife together is important to him. He said I was being selfish (I am being
  • selfish, but I don't think it's a bad thing here). I explained I understand that, but unless we can stay in other accommodations (like a hotel) or if his parents
  • agree to make the interior cooler for the visit, I will stay behind. Of course, he wants to stay with his family. But
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  • he won't say anything to them about the temperature. This upset me. I told him part of being married is watching out for the
  • wellbeing of your partner and of course it escalated. So have at it. AITAH for not visiting my in-laws
  • until something changes? It seems like such a trivial issue, but it can be unbearable getting minimal sleep, sweating all the time, with no relief for 14 days straight.
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  • Editing to add: it would be difficult for them to travel to visit us, especially for two weeks. They do visit us, and we see them multiple times a year.
  • Husband's relationship with my family is great. My family lives closer, so it's easy to spend a weekend with them here and there.
  • gymratt17 Stay at a hotel. Lets you do shorter visits or meet up at more temperature normal locations.
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  • holyflurki... NTA, and staying at a hotel is an extremely fair compromise. If your husband would prefer staying at his parents' while you get the hotel to yourself, even better!
  • Keep firm on your limits, here. It's not fair that he's too chicken to speak up himself and expects you to suffer for two weeks because of it.
  • Considera... Are they older people? Sometimes older people in the South keep their AC set at that temperature to prevent from having an expensive electricity bill.
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  • Older people normally get cold fast, even in the summer. My dad wore a jacket in the house during the summer. He stayed cold.
  • geekgirlwww NTA sucking up all your vacation time to spend with your in-laws in Mississippi is absurd. Being hot, sick and uncomfortable for two weeks is also ridiculous.
  • ClassyBroa... I could NOT sleep in those conditions and I also would refuse. Your husband needs to stand up for you.

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