search email community favorite this article chev-right latest posts article list comments tags video article login twitter facebook menu pinterest whatsapp

Rambunctious 5 and 7-year-old nephews break everything, so uncle only agrees to watch his sweet 4-year-old niece, their mom throws a fit but uncle stands his ground: ‘[They’re] little walking tornados!'

Advertisement
  • Little boy smiling and jumping with an iphone in his hand.
  • Advertisement
  • "AITA For being honest with my sister-in-law about why I don't do solo hangouts with her kids?"

    I (34M) am the middle child in my family. Both my older brother and my younger sister are married and have kids. We all live in the same 30-mile radius so we get together pretty often and are close. I don't plan on
  • Advertisement
  • having kids of my own but I do enjoy being an uncle and I'm even Godfather to my brother's oldest son. My brother has 2 boys (7 & 5). My sister has a 4- year-old daughter and is 7-months pregnant with
  • her second child. Now, I know my brother and I were rambunctious as kids so I know how boys can be. But omg those 2 are nuts. My niece, on the other hand, pure sweetness.
  • Advertisement
  • For the past few months, my sister has asked me to watch my niece on a weekend for a few hours. No overnights or anything, just the two of us hanging out for half a day or so. This allows my
  • sister and her husband to get things done at home to get ready for the new baby as they have some minor home renovations they are doing. I've taken her to a library, science museum, a couple of movies.
  • Advertisement
  • We had Easter at our parent's place the other week and everyone was there. My niece ran up to me and gave me a huge hug and asked when out next "play date" was going to be. I told her I'd
  • talk with her mom about it and figure it out and she ran off to keep playing. My sister-in-law was nearby and overheard and asked me what my niece meant. I explained
  • Advertisement
  • to her how I've been watching my niece a few times a month so that my sister and BIL can work on the house to get ready for baby.
  • Without skipping a beat, SIL asked me straight up why I don't ever offer to do that with my nephews. I told her I didn't offer it to my sister either, I was asked and I accepted.
  • She then asked if I would watch her boys like I do with my niece and I hesitated. I looked over my SIL's shoulder as her 5-year-old was jumping on the couch doing the 6- 7 thing and then did a flying elbow drop onto this brother on the floor.
  • Advertisement
  • I straight up told her "no." She accused me of playing favorites and that I should treat all of the kids the same. I told her I will love all the kids the same, but clearly treating them all the same isn't happening. I told her I
  • could never bring her boys to a library, museum, or movie theater and have the same experience as I do with my niece.
  • At this point my brother had come over because SIL was getting more animated and he asked what was going on. SIL told him that I have been playing favorites with my niece and "neglecting" 1- on-1 time with her boys.
  • Advertisement
  • At that point I was pretty upset and cut her off. I told her that yes, it's 100 times easier to hang out with my niece because she's a sweetheart not a little walking tornado. I
  • reminded her that everything in their house is broken because of the boys and they don't even take them to movies themselves because they know they can't sit down and shut up for more than 90-seconds let alone 90 minutes.
  • My mom ended up coming over and separating all of us and it didn't come up again the rest of the day.
  • Advertisement
  • Little girl with pigtails and a sweatshirt with a sparkling star on it holds her hands up to her face and smiles
  • val_girl NTA. You didn't owe equal solo time. You also didn't ask for any of this you were asked. The issue is their expectations, not your boundaries.
  • Independent_Peak8500 NTA sil asked a question and you answered. No one ever said the truth was nice and it sounds like she was long over due for it. Stick to your guns and protect your peace. Be prepared she will try to stir the sh between you and your mother/ brother but DO NOT BACK DOWN. She is also not entitled to a yes to a question just because she asked and your family.
  • Advertisement
  • thetinymole NTA. You don't owe either of them free babysitting and it's not your job to parent them. If you'd be willing to spend alone time with them once they're able to behave in public spaces, tell her that. But no is also a full sentence.
  • ColorMyTrauma NTA, but consider other types of outings with the boys. Could you bring them to a playground or a trampoline park? It's okay if it's not something you're willing to do, just remember that you can spend time with them differently than you spend time with your niece.
Scroll Down For The Next Article
Show Comments
Next Article