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    Neighbor parents tell their 7-year-old to sneak into the pool next door, but the homeowner refuses to allow him to swim without supervision: ‘I became an unpaid lifeguard and babysitter'

    Author image for Jesse Kessenheimer
    Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor
    Apr 4, 2026 5:00 PM EDT

    She was trying to keep their child safe, but that somehow made her the villain in the neighborhood. 

    A pool is a lot of fun, but also a lot of responsibility. Like a boat or a jet ski, pools are the kind of commodity that is best kept at arm's length to avoid the potential responsibility that comes with them. You always want to have a close friend with a pool, boat, or jet ski, but managing your own (storing it, cleaning it, paying for it, and accepting all the liability that comes with the fun) is a colossal burden.

    As a parent with a pool, this burden is compounded because the safety of your kiddos, as well as their friends, their friends' parents, and apparently every neighbor kid on the street. Because once the temperature starts rising, AC bills get higher, and the thought of a sweet little drink by the poolside starts becoming irresistible, your pool will become the most poppin' spot in the neighborhood…

    …Whether you like it or not. 

    A 37-year-old mom recently bought a house with a pool at the end of the street, and for her, it was a dream come true. That is, until she learned about all the ways that homeownership differs from pool ownership. Her own children loved the pool and played like fish until they were pruney on every finger, and sometimes she was gracious enough to let the kids next door come over to play, too. But when the entitled parents next door started seeing her yard and her pool as a free public playground, the lines between fun, responsibility, and property liability started to blur. 

    No parent wants to be on the hook if something awful happens on their watch, but even when you're not watching, if it's your pool, it's your responsibility. 

    However, the neighbor parents didn't agree. Instead of asking for permission when their kid wanted a dip, they encouraged a 7-year-old to hop the fence and play in the pool all by his lonesome: No supervision, no parent, and nobody to ensure he stayed safe. But when the homeowner caught them doing this, they tried to brush it off as she owed them the free lifeguard duty, but she wouldn't budge. Now she's facing the backlash in the neighborhood group chat, but the peer pressure will never shake her resolve to parent the boy next door when it seemed like his own parents had lost the plot. 

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    • 01
      Boy swims in a pool all alone.
      via Sóc Năng Động

      Boy swims in a pool all alone. 

      (Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.)

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    • 02

      [I told] my neighbor her kid isn't allowed in my pool after she "forgot" him at my house

      Im (37F) honestly still shaking a bit while writing this because i hate confrontation, but i feel like im being treated like a villain in my own neighborhood.
      via Educational-Wait-406
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    • 03
      My husband and i bought our house about 2years ago. One of the main reasons we chose it was the backyard and the pool.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 04
      We have two kids (a son and a daughter), and they practically live in that water during the summer.
      via Educational-Wait-406
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    • 05
      A few months ago, a new couple moved in next door with their 7year old boy.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 06
      At first, things were fine. We did the whole "welcome to the neighborhood" thing, and our kids played together a few times.
      via Educational-Wait-406
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    • 07
      The problem started about 3weeks ago. The parents started sending their son over to play, but neither of them would come with him.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 08
      Boy having fun swimming in the neighbor's pool.
      via Soc Nang Dong

      Boy having fun swimming in the neighbor's pool. 

      (Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.)

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    • 09
      They'd just watch him walk across the lawn from their porch and then go back inside.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 10
      Basically, i became an unpaid lifeguard and babysitter for a kid that is not mine. The breaking point happened last saturday.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 11
      I told the mom earlier that morning that we were busy and could not have company.
      via Educational-Wait-406
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    • 12
      Around 2pm, i looked out my kitchen window and saw her son inside my gated pool area.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 13
      He had climbed over the fence. I ran out there and got him out safely, then walked him back home.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 14
      Both parents were in their garage hanging out. When i told them what happened, they did not even look scared.
      via Educational-Wait-406
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    • 15
      The dad just laughed and said, Oh, he's such a little fish! He just loves your pool so much, we did not have the heart to tell him no.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 16
      Then the mom chimed in with, It takes a village, right? I told them right then that he is not allowed in my pool area without me being there and one of them being there to watch him too.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 17
      I told them its a huge safety risk and im not comfortable with the liability. They both got really offended and called me heartless.
      via Educational-Wait-406
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    • 18
      They said that since im already out there with my kids, it should not matter if one more joins in.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 19
      The mom even posted on our local facebook group (without naming me, but everyone knows) about wealthy neighbors who think they own the water and how some people have no sense of community.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 20
      Now, they are not speaking to me, and some of the other neighbors are giving me weird looks.
      via Educational-Wait-406
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    • 21
      I feel like im just trying to keep a kid from drowning and protect myself from a lawsuit, but people are making me feel like im being a mean girl because i wont let a 7year old swim whenever he wants.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 22
      Am I the j here? TL;DR: My married neighbors keep letting their 7year old son sneak into my pool without asking.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 23
      When I told them he's banned for safety and liability reasons, they called me heartless and complained to the neighborhood.
      via Educational-Wait-406
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    • 24
      Any Vehicle7847 "It takes a village" only works when the village actually agrees to help. You did not sign up to be a free lifeguard. The fact that they laughed after he climbed a fence is terrifying. They should be thanking u for saving their son, not trashing you on Facebook. NTJ!
      via Any Vehicle7847
    • 25
      OP Educational-Wait-406 This!! I hate how that "takes a village" line is used as an excuse for lazy parenting. Im happy to help my neighbors, but I did not agree to be a 24/7 unpaid lifeguard. If something happens, its my life thats ruined, not theirs.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 26
      Educational-Joke-267 NTJ. If that kid gets hurt or, heaven forbid, drowns in your pool, those same parents will be the first ones to sue u for everything u own. They are not being neighborly, they are being lazy and dangerous. Keep that gate locked and maybe get a camera just in case.
      via Educational-Joke-267
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    • 27
      OP Educational-Wait-406 This is exactly what keeps me up at night. I cant believe they are more worried about being excluded than their own sons life. I dont want to lose everything we worked for because they wont watch their kid.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 28
      Any_Strawberry8691 Not the j ! He climbed over a fence? Thats not playing, thats trespassing and a massive safety risk. Dont let them guilt trip u. Your pool, your rules, your liability.
      via Any_Strawberry8691
    • 29
      OP Educational-Wait-406 My heart literally dropped when i saw him over the fence. If I had not looked out the window at that exact moment... I dont even want to think about what could have happened. Thanks for the support, I really needed to hear this.
      via Educational-Wait-406
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    • 30
      Katja 1236 NTA. You think you own your own pool? How entitled of you. eyeroll It's a safety matter. Kids that young shouldn't be swimming without a parent present, or another adult who has agreed to supervise in advance. You have not.
      via Katja 1236
    • 31
      OP Educational-Wait-406 This!! Exactly what i was thinking. I was so scared when i saw him in there alone. I cant believe they are not more worried about their own kids safety. Its honestly terrifying.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 32
      LoopyMercutio NTJ- Since the neighbor decided to make it public, make the entire issue public-State that they were sending their kid over without any adult supervision at all, that the parents were sitting in their garage not watching their child, that they expect you to be an unpaid babysitter and lifeguard to their children, and that they've acted completely irresponsibly in regards to their child's welfare and safety. And on top of that, their continued trespassing is now forcing you to add l
      via LoopyMercutio
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    • 33
      OP Educational-Wait-406 You are 100% right. The lawsuit part is what really scares me. If something happened to that kid, they would definitely blame me. Im actually going to get new locks this weekend. Thank u for the advice, I might just have to reply to them publicly with exactly what you said!
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 34
      guitargeek76 If the pool is in YOUR backyard, then yes, you own the water. NTJ, your neighbors are entitled AH's.
      via guitargeek76
    • 35
      OP Educational-Wait-406 Exactly! That "own the water" comment they made on facebook really got to me. Its not about the water, its about not wanting to find a kid at the bottom of my pool because his parents were too busy in the garage.
      via Educational-Wait-406
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    • 36
      EnvironmentalLuck515 I think you are imagining the neighbors giving you weird looks. No responsible adult would have a problem with this and most would be incensed on your behalf. This isn't a decision you need to second guess in any way. If the child drowns on your property you will be held liable. I'd be sending them a certified letter outlining what happened, what you did and how you responded. Because if he really did climb the fence this IS going to happen again and you want documentation t
      via EnvironmentalLuck515
    • 37
      OP Educational-Wait-406 This is solid advice. I did not even think about a certified letter, but having that paper trail sounds like a smart move now. Im definitely not second guessing my decision anymore. Thank u!
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 38
      duskalyth their kid climbed in your fence into a pool and they just.. laughed?? that's not "village", that's bad parenting
      via duskalyth
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    • 39
      OP Educational-Wait-406 Thank u! Thats exactly what I thought. A pool is not a toy, its dangerous. Im just so glad the kid did not drown.
      via Educational-Wait-406
    • 40
      traciw67 Ntj. You need a gate with a lock or some other deterrent. (Spikes?) They are the type of people to sue you when their kid is hurt. I would put up cameras, also. And if they keep ignoring their kid, call CPS. "There's a 7 yr old wandering around my property with no parental supervision!"
      via traciw67
    • 41
      OP Educational-Wait-406 Thanks for the advice. Im actually looking at cameras today because i dont trust them at all now. Its scary that i even have to think about being sued just because they cant watch their own kid. I really hope it does not come to calling CPS, but if he climbs that fence again, I might not have a choice.
      via Educational-Wait-406
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    • 42
      ellexarayne NTJ. You aren't being a 'mean girl,' you're avoiding a lawsuit. A pool is an attractive nuisance. If that kid drowns on your property because his parents are lazy to supervise him, you're the one who loses your house and faces the legal consequences.
      via ellexarayne
    • 43
      OP Educational-Wait-406 You are so right. "Attractive nuisance" is the perfect way to put it. I checked my insurance and its a nightmare if anything happens. Its just wild to me that they'd risk their kids safety and then try to make me the villain on facebook.
      via Educational-Wait-406

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