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Homeowner accused of being in a cult by entire neighborhood after feeding crows every night: 'My neighbor's kid thinks I'm a wizard'

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  • A homeowner stands in front of his open garage door.
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  • [Today I messed up] by accidentally convincing my entire neighborhood that I'm in a crow cult

    This has been building for two years, and I only recently understood the full extent of the damage.
  • I work second shift. I get home around 10:30 PM. Every night I walk to my porch and toss peanuts into the yard for the crows before going inside. I started doing it because | read that crows remember human faces and form longterm relationships with people who feed them. I wanted to see if it worked.
  • It worked. I did not realize how any of this looked from the outside until my neighbor stopped me last fall and asked if I was "doing okay."
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  • Apparently, for two years, multiple neighbors have watched a man arrive home alone at 10:30 PM, stand silently in his dark yard, and perform what can only be described as a ritual offering before
  • disappearing inside without speaking to anyone. I have never done this in daylight. The crows are always already waiting when I pull in, so from the street it looks like I arrive and they simply... come to me. On command. In the dark.
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  • One neighbor told another that I "communicate with them." A third asked if I was "into something." Nobody knocked on my door to ask me directly, which honestly raises more questions about what they thought the answer might be.
  • I tried to explain the science of it to my neighbor, crow intelligence, facial recognition, reciprocal gift giving behavior. He nodded very slowly, the way people nod when they are not going to change their opinion.
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  • Last weekend his kid, eight years old, stopped me at the end of my driveway and asked if I was a wizard.
  • It was 11 PM. I had just worked eight hours of physical labor. I said yes.
  • A flock of birds standing on top of a lush green field.
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  • The kid now leaves little piles of peanuts on my porch railing "to help." The crows eat them. This child believes he is assisting an actual wizard. I have no exit strategy.
  • TL;DR: Fed crows in my yard every night for two years without realizing my neighbors could see me. Now they think I run a cult, my neighbor's kid thinks I'm a wizard, and the crows have only made me look more suspicious over time.
  • A homeowner sits on his porch with his dog, waiting to feed the neighborhood crows.
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  • MarkHaversham Time to grow a beard
  • Sure-Supermarket5... You got an apprentice too. Nice
  • jorwyn I have a neighbor across the street who thinks that I am a witch and makes the sign of a cross with his fingers every time he sees me. It cracks me up.
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  • It's because I can supposedly control the ravens. The ravens do what they want, but one of the things they really want to do is eat treats. One of the other things they really want to do is go harass his dogs and make them bark incessantly.
  • So if I yell at them to knock it off and come back, they will because they know I have treats for them.
  • But also, they don't really like strangers on my property, and they will throw pine cones at them. But I don't think that's because it's my property, I think it's because it's their property. They just don't throw
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  • them at me anymore, because it did not make me go away. And I give out treats. Maybe throw isn't the right word, it's more like drop them on your head from very high up. But if
  • you're with me, they will behave, so maybe just don't trespass. Or come offering treats.

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