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    26-year-old woman refuses when neighbor demands bread after complaining about the noise created by her baking: 'She is now telling other people in our building that I'm petty and unneighborly'

    How tolerant do we all knead to be of noises in close-quarters living coniditions? While you'd usually imagine baking bread as a rather quiet activity, this home baker managed to get her neighbor all worked up over the noise created by her bread-making. This did not stop the neighbor from requesting the fruits of the labor.

    I like to imagine that every older generation is struck with a deep-seated fear upon seeing that their new neighbors getting out of the moving truck are millennials… As they experience a strong visceral realization that they're going to wind up with a chicken coop next to their home. 

    And it's fair enough, for several complex cultural reasons, we aging millennials have a draw, a desire to be more connected with our lives and the natural world. 

    Egged on by this feeling that we're disconnected from the lives and experiences that the humans before us had had for many thousands of years. Baking, knitting, embroidering, canning, taking up pottery and woodworking, we're all looking for ways of slowing down and disconnecting from the World Wide Web that turned the world on its head over the last 35 years. 

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    • 01
      A woman works on kneading a loaf of sourdough
      via Jonathan Borba

      The image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    • 02

      AITAH for refusing to share my homemade bread with a neighbor who complained about the noise of making it?

      I (26F) am incredibly passionate about baking sourdough bread. Recently, I took it a step further and invested in a home grain mill so I can mill my own flour. It makes a massive difference in the quality of the bread, but the mill is a bit loud. Because I live in an apartment, I try to be mindful of the noise. I only use it for a few minutes at a time, usually right in the middle of the afternoon, never early in the morning or late at night. A few weeks
      via Notyourtypicalsw

    • Many a chicken coop has been erected, and a lifestyle block has been envisioned as we turn our sights not toward the future but toward the past, away from the computers we're stuck at for our entire working lives. We have turned to the skills and methods of production that maybe not even our parents practiced, but that certainly our grandparents and great-grandparents would have.

      A persistent noise can be a nuisance in any neighborhood, and a crowing rooster and hens can certainly be one of them. But we wouldn't normally expect baking to make that long list of noisy, disruptive activities. That is, unless you have decided to take up actually milling your own flower in the confines of your apartment like this. 

      While I like to think that, especially in close living conditions, we could all be a little more tolerant of one another, we could also all be a little more considerate. Vibrations and especially low bassy noises travel a long way and through a surprising number of walls and solid objects. In an apartment building or other living situation where there are shared walls, floors, or ceilings 

      The occasional optimist in me wants to think that perhaps the neighbor it trying to mend a bridge over troubled water here while struggling to come to grips with being vibrated out of her apartment for 10 minutes at a time. Who's in the right here? Who knows, probably no one. But you be the judge.

    • 03
      ago, my older neighbor knocked on my door to complain about the grinding noise coming from my place. I apologized, explained what it was, and assured her I only run it for about five to ten minutes at most. To smooth things over, I even brought her a freshly baked loaf of sourdough the next day. She told me they enjoyed it afterwards and thanked me for it.
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 04
      Since then, this neighbor has started casually knocking on my door whenever she smells bread baking, asking if I have any spares. I usually don't mind sharing, so I've given her two more loaves over the past month.
      via Notyourtypicalsw
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    • 05
      Yesterday, I was milling grain at 2:00 PM on a Saturday. My neighbor knocked again, but this time she was furious. She told me the noise was incredibly disruptive and asked me to stop doing it entirely. I told her that milling is part of my process to make the bread and I wouldn't stop, but reiterated that it only lasts a few minutes during the day. She then asked if I was baking today. When I told her I was, I also mentioned that since she still complains about the mill sounds after knowing wha
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 06
      She is now telling other people in our building that I'm petty and unneighborly, and is threatening to complain to our landlord about the noise. My significant other thinks I should have just given her a loaf to keep the peace, but I shouldn't have to reward someone for complaining about a reasonable daytime activity. AITAH?
      via Notyourtypicalsw
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    • 07
      A baked loaf of sourdough is placed carefully on a table
      via Franzi Meyer
    • 08
      Particular_Title42 This is like a more aggressive version of the story of The Little Red Hen. NTA for not giving her bread anymore but I do wonder if there's anything you can do to lessen the sound of the mill. Where does this neighbor live in relation to you?
      via Notyourtypicalsw
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    • 09
      Notyourtypicalsw Original Poster's Reply Hmm. Not particularly. Unfortunately, my kitchen is on the wall connecting our apartments, and running the mill elsewhere in the apartment isn't really feasible. Perhaps I could look at getting sound-dampening wall boards to put up where the mill is, but I don't think that will accomplish much.
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 10
      tiredgirl77 Sound complaints, while vary from community to community, I've never seen one that can be made from only 10 minutes of noise! The neighbor just wants bread and I'd honestly flat out say to anyone who brings up her complaints to you. Or you could get ahead of it and complain that she keeps knocking on your door asking for bread!
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 11
      Notyourtypicalsw Original Poster's Reply That's probably true. I'm planning on moving in late June, I was worried about having her complain to my landlord, but she is indeed causing issues as well. I will definitely draft an email to send to him later today.
      via Notyourtypicalsw
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    • 12
      hookedonnaturr A lot of excess sound could be the vibration of the table or counter the grinder is sitting on. Perhaps putting a portion of carpet or fluffy towels under it?
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 13
      Notyourtypicalsw Original Poster's Reply Another commenter mentioned that earlier, I will definitely look into it!
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 14
      Wide-Speaker-7384 Unless there is a noise ordinance or agreement for the building, and as long as the other neighbors aren't complaining, you do not have much to worry about. Let the old biddy complain. She can put on noise canceling headphones, put in ear plugs, go out for a ten minute walk, or just wait ten minutes. I am going to assume the mill is not any louder than a blender or bean grinder and it is acceptable to presume people will use kitchen appliances during the day. She can go f herse
      via Notyourtypicalsw
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    • 15
      A loaf of sourdough is roughly kneaded on a bench top
      via Nadya Spetnitskaya
    • 16
      Notyourtypicalsw Original Poster's Reply There is no noise ordinance attached to the building agreement, outside of the basic sleeping hours, but I always overanalyze and worry too much about the small things. A friend is saying I'm worried over nothing, but I still wanted advice on how to handle the situation, and if there were truly any ways my neighbor could come at me for the noise.
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 17
      Round-Ticket-39 It is. I dont know what kind op has but ours not cheap, real stone inside, i must say was extra noisy and you needed to run flour thru several times to get finest quality. Its fast on other hand.
      via Notyourtypicalsw
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    • 18
      Notyourtypicalsw Original Poster's Reply I have a Nutrimill Classic, and it can get pretty noisy since it uses actual stones. It's fast and efficient, though, unlike the KitchenAid attachment I used to use.
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 19
      L1ttleFrog Nah, make it for the landlord, give them a big incentive to ignore the neighbour.
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 20
      Notyourtypicalsw Original Poster's Reply I will most definitely have to do that after sending him an email about her instigation. Fingers crossed it will sway him to keep the peace for the next few months!
      via Notyourtypicalsw
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    • 21
      StockAdhesiveness351 You did give her a loaf to keep the peace. Not your fault she broke the peace treaty. NTA, but if you WANT to be petty then let all your other neighbors know you make fresh home baked bread and would love to give then a sample, and if they love it they can purchase more loafs in the future for a minimal price. Become the bread Queen of the apartment. Make a profit from selling to everyone and working that mill for hours each day just to annoy her.
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 22
      Notyourtypicalsw Original Poster's Reply Thank you for the confidence boost! My SO has definitely called me a bread queen in the past since I send him to his job with extra loafs we couldn't eat! I definitely might start giving some loaves away to other tenants instead!
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 23
      my- Dont give her bread. This is a matter of principles. Condoning this way of being in the world is not the healthy choice even if it's the path of least resistance. Quite frankly I think you're within your right considering the time of day. And who cares what your loser neighbours gossip about. You'll probably move in the next years anyways.
      via Notyourtypicalsw
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    • 24
      Notyourtypicalsw Original Poster's Reply That was 100% the plan. I'm close to graduating, and my lease is up in June. It is unfortunate that it has come to this.
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 25
      pangalacticcourier NTA. I have experience with this exact situation. If you're milling during afternoon hours, and just for a few minutes at a time, you are guilty of zero violation. The police will laugh at the matter if this is explained to them. Your landlord can do nothing about this, as well. You're not using an industrial or commercial electric mill. Zero zoning issues there. You have nothing to worry about, OP. "Yep. I'm making fresh sourdough again today, Karen. I hope you enjoyed the fi
      via Notyourtypicalsw
    • 26
      Notyourtypicalsw Original Poster's Reply I'm glad I'm not the only one. I hope it doesn't come down to the police calling, but you are absolutely right if that situation comes into being. I appreciate the shared experience and the advice! It definitely makes me feel better finishing out the last few months living next to my bread Karen.
      via Notyourtypicalsw
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    • 27
      Brilliant_Lime_3680 If the mill is unacceptable, the bread it produces should be too.
      via Notyourtypicalsw

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