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The biggest lie ever told is “let’s play a board game, it’ll be chill.” No, it won’t, and we both know it.
The second that box hits the table, something in me shifts. I don’t know how to explain it, but I’m no longer here to have a nice time. I’m here to win, and unfortunately for everyone else, I’m also willing to destroy years of friendship in the process.
With love, of course.
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Because let’s be honest, game night reveals who people really are. Your introvert friend? Yeah, she's calculating every move three turns ahead. Your nonchalant friend? Lying!! Deeply invested, strategy perfectly made in their head. And your patient rules-explaining friend? Okay, I'll chill, they're safe. Thanks for the patience. But lowkey why do you know them so well?
And then there’s me, pretending I understand what’s going on after fully zoning out during the explanation. I’ll nod, I’ll say “yeah that makes sense,” and then immediately start making decisions that confuse even myself.
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But somehow… I’m still a threat. Especially in UNO.
UNO is where morals completely disappear. I don’t care how close we are, if I have a +4 and you’re about to win, I’m using it. No hesitation. No remorse. You will pick up those cards and you will sit there while I make eye contact with you. And if you hit me with one?
Oh, now it’s personal. Now I’m targeting you for the rest of the game. I don’t even care about winning anymore, I just need you to lose. That’s where we’re at. I promise I shake hands after playing a game, Its kind of my way of saying sorry for going crazy and shouting to you for 3 hours straight.
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And don’t even try to pull a random “house rule” out of nowhere when you’re losing. Suddenly it’s “oh we’ve always played like this”, no we haven’t, dont lie. You made that up five seconds ago and now we have to stop the game to argue about it like it’s a courtroom.
It’s chaos, It’s dramatic, It’s slightly unhinged. And I wouldn’t have it any other way. Because at the end of the day, I do love my friends. Just… not enough to let them win.
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