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    38-year-old refuses to move into husband's childhood home due to prenup negotiations: '[Am I wrong] for not wanting to move into a house I’ll never have any legal claim to?'

    This woman knew that she wasn't being protected when her husband requested that the family move into a house she had zero claim over. 

    Despite receiving pressure from her in-laws, she stood her ground… even though she already signed an unfair prenuptial agreement.

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    • A husband and wife argue on the couch about inheriting the husband's childhood home.
      via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

      A husband and wife argue on the couch about inheriting the husband's childhood home.

      Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    • [Am I wrong] for not wanting to move into a house I’ll never have any legal claim to?

      I (38F) signed a prenup before marrying my husband (42M) because he has significant business assets and investment properties.
      via spangleddangle
    • The agreement says that anything purchased before or even during the marriage is separate property unless it's jointly titled.
      via spangleddangle
    • And even if something is jointly owned, ownership is strictly based on financial contribution. So if one person pays 90%, they own 90%.
      via spangleddangle
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    • If we divorce, he keeps everything that's his separate property, and I would only receive my portion of jointly owned assets based on what I financially contributed.
      via spangleddangle
    • That's what we agreed on and I'm fine with that In the event of d th, it's different.
      via spangleddangle
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    • Anything held jointly would 100% pass to me. But anything he owns separately would pass to his nephew.
      via spangleddangle
    • From what he's said, his nephew would essentially control everything he owns (as executor or trustee).
      via spangleddangle
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    • Sometimes, it takes a minute for people to realize that they are being manipulated. This author may not have considered the possibility that the prenup she signed before getting married was not exactly a fair and just agreement. However, you know what they say. Better late than never!

      Now, several years later, she had a bad feeling about moving into her husband's childhood home. As she explains, the terms of this new arrangement would leave her with absolutely nothing unless the husband suffered a sudden fatal accident. Otherwise, her future was not taken into consideration. 

      It might have taken some time for her to make sense of this, but the 38-year-old finally admitted to herself that her well-being was never really taken into consideration from the very beginning. It wasn't just this time around. In fact, the terms of this agreement likely would not have been so skewed in her husband and child's favor had she spoken up earlier in previous negotiations about advocating for her fair share.

    • I also have no issue there. Now he's talking about buying his parents' house and having us move into it as our family home.
      via spangleddangle
    • The wife leans her head into her hand in frustration following their disagreement.
      via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

      The wife leans her head into her hand in frustration following their disagreement.

      Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

    • It would be purchased into a trust and structured as his separate property. If we divorce, I would not get the house or any equity, which I understand and accept under the prenup.
      via spangleddangle
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    • The problem - I asked what would happen to the house if he ds. He said our 10- month-old daughter would be the beneficiary, and his nephew would be the trustee/executor.
      via spangleddangle
    • So I wouldn't own the house, control it, or have guaranteed rights to remain there in the event of his d h.
      via spangleddangle
    • I'm struggling with the idea of building our family life in a home that I'm structurally guaranteed not to have a long-term claim to.
      via spangleddangle
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    • I'm not trying to undo the prenup or take his family's property. I just feel uneasy about making our primary family home something I have zero legal protection in.
      via spangleddangle

    • The truth of the matter is that although this argument was clearly difficult for both parties to have, the author will be glad she had it in the long run. On the one hand, it might force her husband to reconsider how she has been treated on paper during these negotiations and allow him the opportunity to course-correct. However, on the other hand, if he refuses to do so, then his wife will, for better or worse, see her spouse for who he truly is.

    • The husband checks the messages on his phone after arguing with his wife.
      via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

      The husband checks the messages on his phone after arguing with his wife.

      Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

    • EDIT 1 - Holy cow I didn't expect this post to gain so much traction.
      via spangleddangle
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    • I posted it last night before bed and woke up to too many comments to even read through.
      via spangleddangle
    • I'll edit again later today to provide some clarification on a few things.
      via spangleddangle
    • Lonely-World-981 NTA. Speaking as a man slightly older than your husband - if this is real, you should immediately seek a divorce. Your husband is human garbage. I get the fact that extremely wealthy people want to protect assets. I have a lot of friends like that, but they did it. fairly. The setup on this is insanely one- sided. You may think it's fine, but it's not. What you agreed to is extremely stupid and shortsighted. Now you're learning that. You didn't fully understand what you agreed t
      via spangleddangle
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    • Specialist_Wind_6488 Why is everything that he owns separately going to his nephew and not your child or any future children? And NTA.
      via spangleddangle
    • mcmurrml Unfortunately what you signed benefits him and not you. You have no protection in this marriage and this is not a good deal for you going forward. You really should have hired a separate lawyer to go over it with you. It's possible you see now based on your post this deal with the house does not benefit you in any way.
      via spangleddangle
    • RandomReddit9791 That's such a one-sided prenuptial. Im surprised you're ok with everything. It feels like you're not building anything with him that you'd really have access to.
      via spangleddangle
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    • WTH_JFG Have you consulted an attorney other than the one that is preparing the prenup? Your security is not being considered. That prenup can be structured differently to provide you more security. Your husband and his attorney have made a conscious decision to not provide for you. That would be a big concern to me. YMMV.
      via spangleddangle

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