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Couple’s plan to take kids to Disneyland California during summer vacation blocked by in‑laws’ demand the children only experience Disney World Florida on a trip with them

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  • Crowds of visitors walking down Main Street toward Cinderella Castle at Walt Disney World, with blue castle spires in the distance and festive decorations lining the buildings.
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  • AIO to my in-laws Disneyland ultimatum?

    Please let me know whether you agree this is a crazy ultimatum that I find myself in the middle of with my in-laws.
  • Me (29 M) and my spouse (30 F) of 7 years have 3 kids all age 5 and under who have never been to a Disney park.
  • Only other important preface to this post is that my parents and my in-laws are not very friendly; they get along well enough but I would not say they're close.
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  • grew up on the west coast and spent a ton of time at Disneyland growing up.
  • My wife grew up on the east coast and same deal for Disney World obviously. We both have dear childhood memories at those separate parks.
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  • We have serious plans to go to Disney World in a couple of years with my in-laws.
  • Cinderella Castle at Walt Disney World in Florida, with blue rooftops and white stone towers, surrounded by visitors walking through the theme park on a sunny day.
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  • Dates and everything. That's their special park and my in-laws want to share that memory with my kids so they will join for that trip.
  • I am all aboard for this, my parents will not be present for this trip because that place is special for my wife's side of the family.
  • Now the issue/situation: my family of 5 will be in southern California this summer, vacationing on the beach with my (Disneyland) side of the family.
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  • My mom wants to take the kids to Disneyland and pay for the whole day. When my wife and in-laws got word of this, they have said that if we decide to this, my in- laws plan to fly across the country to California to be there.
  • Cinderella Castle at Walt Disney World with pink walls and blue spires under a bright blue sky with scattered clouds, surrounded by stone towers and decorative banners.
  • They are that d ad- set on being there for the kids' first time experiencing Disney. Like I prefaced, my parents and my in- laws are not friendly with each other.
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  • If the above event happened, it would almost certainly be taken by my parents as intruding on a special day and core memory.
  • My perspective: I am seriously looking into LegoLand instead to avoid this entire mess. I believe it is completely petty of my in-laws to put this ultimatum out there.
  • I have been to both parks, I believe the two can be very separate core memories for my kids
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  • But instead it seems my hand is being forced to not let them experience DisneyLand until after and only after they have been to Disney World with my in-laws.
  • I am curious whether I am overreacting? Thanks for honest feedback, open for questions on details I missed.
  • Used Clock_4627 Remind your WIFE AND IL's that this has STOPPED being about the kids AT ALL. It's about their egos. And that isn't good enough for anyone's kids. NOR. You are, in fact, underreacting. You need to sit down with you WIFE and get her on the same page with you. If she can't get on the same page with you about this, than the IL's trip HAS to be cancelled. Full stop. Using kids like that is repugnant.
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  • MembershipScary 1737 Dude I went to Disney at 5 and 6 and 7, I have zero memories of it. This will not be a core memory with 3 kids under 5. Sure they will have a good time but you're all making this a big deal
  • txa1265 Go to Disney land/world without EITHER family - give the kids their first experience WITH YOU (and wife) and THEN who cares what the parents want to do. NOR
  • Prestigious_Tea_111 Go with just your wife and kids. No grandparents need to be involved on either side.
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  • CivMom You and your wife need to have a serious talk. This is about your kids, not your ILs. And you know what? LEGOland may be a great alternative. I think one day with kids that young at Disney is going to be an overwhelming, chaotic mess anyway. Go somewhere more manageable. Make good memories. Hagn in there.
  • Birdiloooo Honestly I'd do Legoland bc I too hate drama and would not be okay with making this day such a big deal for no reason. Legoland is more geared to little kids and you can find decent deals. They're too young for this to be a big deal. Im a Southern California person too with find memories of Disney.
  • Isp2005 While you cannot stop them from going, you don't have to eat lunch with them or stand on line with them. I would tell them I know they are free to do what they want, but we will not be traveling with them or going through the park with them. This is not about your kids. It is about them and their wants. They sound like they want to steam roll your family. I do not reward people who pull antics like this. I had it in my own family. I had to learn to put my foot down. I am so sorry you are
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  • ProfessionalYam3119 You and your whole family are placing WAY too much emphasis on the "Disney experience."
  • davehal2001 At my ex wife's insistence I took small children to Disney World. They don't remember the trip. Someone else noted this is no longer about the children but the adults. That person is correct. Enjoy your trip to LegoLand. When your kids are old enough take them to a Disney park. When you do, DO NOT tell any grandparents until after the trip is over. They will be p ed but they'll get over it. NOR.
  • TortiTrouble Three kids under 5 at Disney sounds like hol.

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