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    Spoiled cousin living on her parents' expense, gets cut off by entire family after her entitled demands and grudges cross the line

    Some people who grew up spoiled grow up to treat their family like a private spa they get to redecorate every time they feel slighted. And this entitled cousin is the pinnacle of that. She did not invent entitlement, but she did file a design patent on it before the rest of her relatives figured out what was happening

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    • Young woman with long blonde hair sitting on wooden porch steps, resting her chin on her hand and looking pensively at the camera, wearing a white blouse and blue jeans.
      via Brock Wegner

      Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    • We Don't Talk About Entitled Cousin

      \*Edited to add context for better clarification I have been sitting on this saga for a while, but since I recently saw the EC in question and got more tea, I thought it was time to share.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Here is the story of entitled cousin, and why I always tell my husband, "We Don't Talk About Entitled Cousin".
      via ShyFanGirl
    • EC is the youngest child of one of my uncles on my dad's side. She is about 6 months younger than my sister, so they did a lot together growing up.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • Sports, activities, you name it. I remember her as being a nice cousin, but never really being a playmate of hers, since she had my sister.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Plus, I preferred one of her older sisters as my favorite cousin. But in high school in when I noticed that she started to change and the entitlement started.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • She seemed more reserved, developed an ED, didn't really have any friends, etc. Her main problem was that she developed a nasty attitude about everything.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Young woman with long blonde hair sitting on wooden steps outside a house, resting her chin on her hand and looking at the camera, wearing a white shirt, blue jeans, and green sneakers.
      via Brock Wegner

      Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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    • She became short with everyone and was just downright mean, displaying several narcissistic traits. Saying nasty comments about everyone around here, even her own family.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • And her spoiled nature started to show, too. If the family wanted to go out to eat, it had to be at a place she liked, only wanted clothes from high-end stores, didn't want to go to places she hated, etc.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • For example, she didn't come to her brother's birthday dinner because it was at a restaurant she hated.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • She went to at least three different high schools within two years, even tried to come to the high school my sister and I went to, but eventually returned to her original high school.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • She went off to college and her entitlement grew. For you see, her parents, thanks to my uncle, are fairly well off, especially after my uncle retired and got a very nice retirement package after the company he worked for went public, and she took full advantage of that.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Anything she wanted, anywhere she wanted to go, her parents paid for it. Especially expensive vacations.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • Young woman wearing a pink top and wired earphones standing by a window, looking thoughtfully outside with city buildings blurred in the background.
      via Getty Images For Unsplash+

      Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

    • So she's entitled and spoiled. Our family knows that she has some sort of mental illness, probably bipolar, but she's never been officially diagnosed.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • That's also why she's never had a long term relationship with a guy, the guys discover her entitled, crazy attitude and leave.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • From early on, she projected this vibe that everything had to orbit her mood, her preferences, and her schedule. If the family wanted to eat somewhere, it had to be her kind of place, not hers. If anyone else got a win, like a graduation or a once‑in‑a‑lifetime trip, she turned it into an audition for her own leading role in the family drama. She treated boundaries like suggestions and other people’s plans like optional add‑ons to her own. Her parents’ money and the condo rule became a blunt instrument she used to remind everyone who supposedly deserved space, comfort, and privacy more than them.  

    • She drives them away, as her older sister said once. During one of her trips back home, my mom was visiting my aunt and EC said some not nice things to my mom.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Now, to be clear, my mom is not a saint, that's a whole other story, but still my cousin was out of line and EC and my mom got into a huge fight, and they haven't talked to each other since, won't even acknowledge each other.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Then a few years later, EC and my sister get into a huge fight where words were thrown at each other.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • My sister has since apologized, but EC hasn't. And they don't talk to each other anymore.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • My dad and I are innocent, but EC refuses to acknowledge us out of association with my mom and sister.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Her older siblings all think her grudge against my family is weird and stupid. We cousins are still close to this day, but she's the odd one out.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • She did come up to me at another cousin's wedding to congratulate me on my first baby, as I was in my third trimester at the time, but then quickly walked away.
      via ShyFanGirl

    • The real genius is how she weaponized emotional distance. She would cut people off for old fights, then stroll back in only when she needed something or wanted to perform a little moment of faux‑kindness, like congratulating someone on a baby and then vanishing like a mediocre stage magician. She framed her grudges as moral stances, as if refusing to interact with relatives was some kind of spiritual cleanse rather than a choice to keep poisoning relationships. Meanwhile she stayed glued to her parents’ wallet and her dog, collecting expensive vacations and tiny friend groups as if quantity of experiences could ever substitute for quality of treatment.  

    • And she didn't even acknowledge my dad, her dad's own brother. Yeah, it was awkward. And it was even more awkward that she brought her boyfriend at the time to the wedding, only for them to separate a couple months later.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Now, recently, my sister gave me more tea on EC. My sister confessed that EC was nasty even when they were kids, before high school.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • Not as bad as she is now, but it was starting to show when EC was a kid.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Snide comments, always wanting to do things her way, etc. My sister only tolerated her because again, our dad and her dad are brothers, but by the time high school happened, my sister stared to distance herself from EC, although she did have to let EC shadow her for a day when EC wanted to come to our high school, but then didn't, much to my sister's relief.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • But the big tea was their fight they had where they won't speak to each other anymore.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • For you see, my uncle owns a condo in a very famous South Carolina town and my sister wanted to use it for a week as a graduation present (she just got her doctorate) and go with her boyfriend, now husband.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • (BIL) My aunt gave her permission to use it, so my sister assumed she and BIL would have the place to themselves for a week.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Then a few weeks later, she took my sister out to lunch, which my aunt never does.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • At the end of the lunch, my aunt awkwardly admits that EC will be at the condo the same week as my sister and BIL.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • For you see, my uncle has a rule that anyone can use the condo at any time, even if there's overlap.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • My sister was crushed. Now I don't know if my sister or EC had asked for that week first, so either my aunt forgot about it and realized it later, or EC knew my sister was going that week and still planned for it anyway.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • She called EC and asked if she could go another week, which would have been easy for EC as she worked a remote job at the time.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • EC said no. EC then said, "What, you just want to be alone with your boyfriend all week so you can f\\\* him?" My sister was horrified by that, and not in her best judgment, retorted by telling EC that she's never been in a serious relationship so she wouldn't know what it's like to have a devoted boyfriend.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • More fighting and they stopped talking to each other. Now, keep in mind, the trip still happened, and sister, BIL, and EC were all at the condo at the same time, so it was super awkward.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • The only thing more consistent than her entitlement is how everyone else keeps politely pretending there is hope for repair, even though she runs every chance straight into the ground. She is the reason their family has a secret code phrase, the one that gets whispered whenever she is mentioned, because the real plot twist is not what she has done, but how much space she still takes up without lifting a finger to change.

    • My sister did apologize, but EC didn't. Now they don't talk to each other, only a quick "Hello" from my sister and a grunt from EC.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • So EC is now in her mid thirties, no boyfriend, just has a dog, lives out West somewhere with a small friend group (shocker I know), and goes on expensive trips that her parents pay for (although they go with her).
      via ShyFanGirl
    • While her older siblings are all married with children and living happily, which she is slightly jealous of.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • And she refuses to interact with my family. If she ever gets married (it will be shocking if she ever does), my dad thinks my uncle will force her to invite us to save face, but we all will probably RSVP no as we have accepted that she doesn't like us (although myself and my dad have done nothing to her) and she's a terrible human being.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • I feel sorry for her, I really do, and I still love her as my cousin, but she needs to acknowledge her faults if she ever wants to repair the relationships she's broken.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • But I don't ever see that happening. But there's still hope.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • Trixlx You seem bothered by a lot of things that have nothing to do with you. And you didn't actually provide examples of being entitled. Just some family beef and probably best to have no contact.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • ShyFanGirl Original Poster's Reply She's very narcissistic. I think she knew that may sister was using the condo the same week, but I'm not 100% sure. She's holding a grudge against my sister and mom and won't forgive and move on. Even her older siblings think her grudge against my family is stupid and weird. I still love her as a cousin, but she isn't very likable.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Trixlx You haven't actually given examples of her being narcissistic though. And you don't know who asked for the cabin first. So, you could just be slandering her with no reason. You also seem very male centered, since you think romantic relationships or lack thereof prove anything. Like toxic crazy people haven't been getting married and staying together for centuries.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • ShyFanGirl Original Poster's Reply She's very her way or the highway type of person. And my sister tried to compromise with her, but EC wouldn't budge. And I know that her not having a steady boyfriend is her choice, I respect that. But I also know she's slightly jealous of her older siblings who have. significant others and children. She's had boyfriends before, but none have stayed around for too long to be possible husband candidates. She drives them away, her older sister's words, not mine
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Wide_Comment3081 You seem to think being an unmarried woman is some sort of bad thing, and I feel sorry for you that you think of marriage as the ultimate goal in life for women.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • ShyFanGirl Original Poster's Reply I don't think it's a bad thing, but EC is jealous that all of her siblings are married.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • bobdown33 How did your sister try to compromise, did she offer to go different dates, you never mentioned that in your post?
      via ShyFanGirl
    • ShyFanGirl Original Poster's Reply She did offer different dates, but my EC said no.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • moose4130 > developed an ED ED is...erectile dysfunction? Entitled disposition?
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • ShyFanGirl Original Poster's Reply Eating disorder
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Boring_Profit4988 Different dates for the cousin to go on vacation or for her? What about splitting to half a week? Sounds like it isnt necessarily ec as much as her personality clashes with your family's + she is petty
      via ShyFanGirl
    • ShyFanGirl Original Poster's Reply Different dates for the cousin as my sister couldn't change hers. As I said, EC was working remote so was more flexible, but may have not been as I understand not all remote jobs are the same. Maybe EC was being petty, maybe my aunt just forgot to mention earlier that EC already picked that week. The point was the fight my sister and EC got into and words were said by both parties that were harsh and crossed lines. My sister apologized, EC never did and still h
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • Boring_Profit4988 So basically everything is either second heard story or assumptions. Again not saying the causin sounds like a sweet peach but I guess after all the stories here Im having trouble seeing the entitlement, just a bit (okay alot, I assume she will hold the grudge till the older generation gets sick\dies and then she will want to start a whole new page) petty, black sheep that might have undiagnosed and untreated mental health issues.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • ShyFanGirl Original Poster's Reply It's hard to put into words on how she is. You just have to meet her to understand. I know there are more entitled, spoiled, narcissistic people out there that are worse than her, but she does fit this category. I just have a hard time finding the right words to express it.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Wide_Comment3081 That's just op saying that, we actually have no idea what cousin thinks. She could be living a fabulous single life.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • ShyFanGirl Original Poster's Reply I know from what her siblings have told me. Also I have another cousin who is single but is having a successful life and I am proud of her for that.
      via ShyFanGirl
    • Wide_Comment3081 The whole post sounds like you're the jealous one op. And you're kind of obsessed about her while she literally doesn't care about you
      via ShyFanGirl
    • ShyFanGirl Original Poster's Reply I'm not jealous. I still love her as my cousin, but I don't like her because of her entitlement and narcissistic traits, and how she treats my family. I always leave the door open for our relationship to start again, but that's up to her.
      via ShyFanGirl
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    • 2cents0fucks Now I've got "We don't talk about Bruno" stuck in my head again.
      via ShyFanGirl

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