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    Entitled girlfriend demands to see boyfriend's work phone, he refuses: 'I have nothing to hide but... my work phone is a no-no'

    This boyfriend showed great restraint when his GF was begging to see his phone, yet he can't convince her that he has nothing to hide. 

    If you're in a relationship, do you really share everything? I know a lot of people share their locations with their partners. Their BF or GF is allowed to read their texts, emails, social media DMs, and even their notes app musings. I simply wouldn't want any partner in my business in that way! Can a person not have privacy anymore? 

    These appear to be the new rules that a lot of modern dating abides by. Even if you have nothing to hide, you're expected to show everything at any time in order to prove your innocence. 

    This person showed from real-world experience why that just can't always work out! 

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    Author image for Remy Millisky Remy Millisky
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    • 01
      Sad girlfriend looks away from boyfriend with her hands on her chin.
      via Getty Images For Unsplash+

      Sad girlfriend looks away from boyfriend with her hands on her chin. 

      The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    • 02
      So to be clear - it is not because I have something to hide. I am a physician in a hospital setting, and as a part of my position have a work phone.
      via u/ Icy-Environment6516
    • 03
      My email can have patient information that is subject to HIPAA and therefore it is passcoded.
      via u/ Icy-Environment6516
    • 04
      Not only do I take HIPAA seriously but I am literally on the advisory committee at the hospital that helps to investigate HIPAA violations.
      via u/ Icy-Environment6516
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    • 05
      So I need to be on the up and up. Anyways a few nights ago she was out to dinner with a friend.
      via u/ Icy-Environment6516
    • 06
      Somehow they got to talking about my work. The friend was asking why I have 2 phones.
      via u/ Icy-Environment6516
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    • 07
      She now has her convinced I am cheating. My GF has been cheated on in the past so it is a trigger.
      via u/ Icy-Environment6516
    • 08
      She came home and asked to look at it "to just put her mind at ease".
      via u/ Icy-Environment6516
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    • 09
      I told her no. My personal phone, go to town. Laptop? Have at it. I don't care as I have nothing to hide.
      via u/ Icy-Environment6516
    • 10
      But there are a ton of reasons that my work phone is a no no. But now she thinks I am being an a hole.
      via u/ Icy-Environment6516
    • 11
      I don't think I am but I also want some outside perspective from someone who doesn't live in HIPAA every day.
      via u/ Icy-Environment6516
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    • 12
      So AITAH?
      via u/ Icy-Environment6516

    • A lot of couples hit this problem when one of the people is trying to plan a surprise for the other. Instead of allowing that person to look at their phone, they have to spend a few weeks hiding it. That makes the partner wary of them, which can bring resentment along with it. 

      But this dude literally has no secret plans up his sleeve. He's only hiding his work phone from his GF! Come on… Unless she thinks he's secretly dating a coworker, and yapping to her all day on said work phone, she's just being overly suspicious. It might signal some bigger problems in their relationship, TBH. Why is she being so distrustful of him when he has a perfectly valid reason not to let her snoop? 

    • 13

      A lot of people agree with the doc

      Comfortable-Foc... NTA - Your girlfriend is being ridiculous.
      via u/Comfortable-Focus123
    • 14

      Exactly! Thank you!

      IceDragonPlay NTA. Not a doctor, so no HIPAA involvement, but my work phone isn't going into anyone else's hands, ever. There are confidential discussions and documents.
      via u/IceDragonPlay
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    • 15
      Has your girlfriend ever had a professional level job? I am thinking not since she would know that was an unreasonable ask if she did. Accusing someone of cheating for having a work phone is ludicrous.
      via u/IceDragonPlay

      This person can rest assured that he isn't in the wrong. 

      I wonder how the GF will react to the pushback! Is this a relationship-ending refusal for her? Because she will quite literally never win here… 

    • 16
      Your girlfriend's 'trigger' is being exploited by her friend, who apparently likes drama. Although if you are dating a high-schooler then yta!
      via u/IceDragonPlay
    • 17
      LikelyLioar NTA. As a patient, I really appreciate you being strict with this.
      via u/LikelyLioar

      This person also saw sense in the doc's argument. These rules aren't a quirky little suggestion, they're the real deal, to be enforced at all times. 

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    • 18
      Boyfriend tries to comfort upset girlfriend.
      via Getty Images For Unsplash+

      Boyfriend tries to comfort upset girlfriend. 

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