Is any job position worth a fender bender on the way to work because of slick roads? No employee wants to do a spinning triple axel out on the ice like figure skaters Alysa Liu or Ilia Malinin, the "Quad God," on the way to the office. These knees weren't built to attempt a Winter Olympic trial in the work parking lot, nor am I dexterous enough to keep from shattering a tailbone on the slick, unkept ice of the driveway. If only there were a way to keep workers off the roads, something lovely and magical, like a winter wonderland snow day.
Can't make it to work today! Too cold. Too snowy.
With the same fervor and glee as a class-ditching high schooler, employee morale would go through the roof if we were granted a snow day. However, the working world doesn't work like the good ol' days; unless we provide shareholder value 100% of the time, employees aren't working hard enough, apparently.
Alas, the pit of the winter season descends upon us, eroding our workday productivity and slowing our projects to a crawl. Although the Q1 energy was up at the beginning of the year, now, the workforce is simply downtrodden, frigid, and buried in snow up to their eyeballs. Like a bear that's desperate to hibernate, humans power down a little bit in the wintertime. People spent all of their excess energy on the holidays, and now, with the faint memory of Santas and lights diminishing in the frosty rearview mirror of our cars, we hardly remember those days of warmth and glee. Instead, we're reminded every morning how our tires can freeze to the pavement, how heavy the snow shovel is, and how infuriating our bosses are when they expect us to be on time every morning anyway.
Sorry, boss, if I wake up at 4:30 AM to dig my car out of a snowbank, if I'm 5 minutes late, I'd better not hear anything from you.
This goes double for hybrid employees. With jobs that are fully functional from the comfort of their snow-free couch, why go into the office? I luckily work fully remote (praise be), and in the wintertime, I proudly wear sweatpants at my desk and curl up under the covers with my laptop perched exactly where it should be according to its namesake: My lap. However, I witness the snow fatigue and the exhaustion of others in the workforce, who are forced to slog out to the car in their snow boots, defrost their windshield for 30 minutes, and endure the icy, unsalted roads all the way to their jobs.
On a positive note, I haven't seen a mosquito in months!
So for employees who are feeling the frost of the cold months wearing them down, fear not, there is one thing that can warm your spirits: Memes. Humor has a funny way of turning around the most sour of moods, even if your work socks are wet from snowmelt and the heater just conked out in your car. Warm your fingers to the wistful, happy scrolls of memehood, and take a load off with your coworkers.
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