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    Single mom CC's the entire family in an email to pressure her cousin to babysit her 2 kids while she's vacationing, cousin refuses: 'I'm not doing it'

    A cousin was staying behind from a family vacation to watch their niece and nephew, and another mom saw that as an invitation to dump her kids onto her babysitting schedule, because what's another two kids, am I right? 

    Babysitting two kids is very different than babysitting four kids. Although you're already a slave to the kids' schedules, once you're outnumbered by the little gremlins, the task is no longer manageable, especially if you're not accustomed to juggling childcare responsibilities with your job, your errands, and your sleep schedule. Although the woman in this next story was relieved to stay behind and watch her niece and nephews during an overwhelming family wedding abroad, she didn't expect her 2-kid weekend of babysitting to double overnight. However, once a single mom, her cousin caught wind that she was babysitting someone else's kids, she saw that as an open invitation to leave her kids behind as well. 

    Just because the wedding was child-free doesn't mean that every parent on the guest list gets to leave their kid at the cousin's house like it's a free family daycare. Naturally, the cousin adamantly refused, not wanting to be a part of a 4-child babysitting ring, but that single mom really wanted a break from her kids.

    Unjustly, the single mom retaliated when her cousin said no, deciding to lay on the peer pressure by sending out a tone-deaf email out, CC'ing the entire family and thanking the cousin for accepting her offer. Once more, the cousin refused, but this was one refusal that rocked every root of the entire family tree. 

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    Author image for Jesse Kessenheimer Jesse Kessenheimer
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    • Woman feeling overwhelmed and indecisive.
      via fairpharma

      Woman feeling overwhelmed and indecisive.

      (Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.)

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    • AITJ: for not babysitting two extra children to allow a single mum to go to a wedding?
      via Dijstraanon
    • Last year, I agreed to look after my husband's nephew and niece over a weekend while he goes with his family to a wedding in Ireland. The wedding is child free which is great, and I really
      via Dijstraanon
    • don't enjoy the Irish wedding traditions that he and his family have. So offering to look after the children was a great compromise. They have stayed at our house many times while their parents have adult time and weekends away. I love both of them to bits.
      via Dijstraanon
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    • At the weekend, my husband's cousin was visiting at his mother's and heard that I am looking after my nephew and niece, so suggested that I look after her two children as well. I
      via Dijstraanon
    • think I've met the children three or four times and they weren't my favourite type of kids. Not wanting to be dismissive I said I would think about it but it was unlikely I could do it as having four children on my own was probably too much.
      via Dijstraanon
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    • Young woman babysitting and feeling overwhelmed by rambunctious children.
      via Africa Images

      Young woman babysitting and feeling overwhelmed by rambunctious children.

      (Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.)

    • Four children is WAY TOO MANY children for one adult to be supervising. Even if you have a bus large enough to tote around all of the carseats, the snacks, and the gear for these kids' sports n' things, you'll never have the time or energy to match them. It's for this reason that I fully respect this woman's decision to say, “No,” as a complete sentence. Absolutely not! 

    • Today I got an email from his cousin, copied in into the whole of Adam's side of the family, saying that she would now be able to go to the wedding thanks to my kind offer to babysit. I then got another email detailing the children's schedules over the weekend,
      via Dijstraanon
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    • which included picking up from a school 15 miles away, ballet and football also 15 miles away on Saturday morning, chess club on Sunday in a different town and finally delivering the youngest to a birthday party,
      via Dijstraanon
    • Mom working on an email with her two young kids on her lap.
      via grinvalds

      Mom working on an email with her two young kids on her lap.

      (Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.)

    • The mom's audacity to CC everyone else in the family to try and guilt-trip her to take on such a challenge is enough to go no-contact in my eyes.

      I have family members who have young children, but I can't imagine them forcing me to take on parenting responsibilities. In this day and age, it's clear that parents have forgotten that the “village” they're relying on to raise their kids is actually just an accumulation of the willing adults in their lives who are ready to babysit. Don't burn bridges with the few people who are willing to help you, you may learn that suddenly your village of guardians has dwindled down to one: You.

    • that would mean me sitting in the car with the other two for 2 to 3 hours or finding something in a small town for them to do on a Sunday afternoon.
      via Dijstraanon
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    • Obviously, I have replied to her second email saying NO. For me no is a complete sentence I have said clearly now that I'm not doing it. Apart from having a single text from her that called
      via Dijstraanon
    • me a bastard I've not heard anything. My husband thinks I've done the right thing, and probably do most of his family, I'm just feeling really uncomfortable about my decision.
      via Dijstraanon

    • She must have heard her answer wrong both times, because when the mom decides to retaliate by doubling down, she must have really missed the point. Perhaps her entitlement has blinded her for so long that she's forgotten what it's like to ask about, plan around, and respect other people's decisions. Or maybe it's that infamous mommy brain fog we hear so much about. 

      Regardless, it's inexcusable to expect your cousin to babysit while you go off on a whirlwind, transatlantic vacation. Find another sitter or deal with it, that's not your family's burden to bear.

    • Am I aj rk for just saying no? Should I have said no to the activities but the kids could stay? Though I really didn't want to do that anyway and was really looking forward to some special times with my nephew and niece.
      via Dijstraanon
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    • Better River2933 NTA at all she basically volunteered you without asking and then dumped a whole itinerary on you like you're some kind of taxi service. The audacity to CC the whole family on that first email too, trying to lock you in with social pressure
      via Better River2933
    • You never actually agreed to anything, you said you'd think about it and it was unlikely. That's not a "kind offer" that's someone hearing what they wanted to hear. Four kids you barely know plus all that driving around? Hard pass
      via Better River2933
    • Don't feel bad about protecting your time with your nephew and niece, that sounds way more enjoyable than being an unpaid chauffeur for someone who calls you names when they don't get their way
      via Better River2933
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    • TOOnarmy1 2 kids is not the same as 4 kids, and then expecting you to run around and do drop offs, activities, etc - with 4 kids? ARe they crazy? No, because she copied the family on purpose. She knew you would say no and was trying to pressure you. Stand firm. "I already am babysitting 2 kids and that's my limit, sorry."
      via TOOnarmy1
    • Princess-Reader You understand all this was premeditated on her part? She just didn't know you'd have the chutzpah to stand firm. I'm impressed, good work.
      via Princess-Reader
    • DexSprinkle. You decided not to allow her to force strange children, whom you don't particularly like and their inconvenient schedules into your weekend with your niece and nephew. I don't see a problem with that.
      via DexSprinkle

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