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    Mom chases dream pharmacy job, husband disagrees because working hours will stop her spending time with their 1-year-old daughter: 'Are you crazy?'

    A good partner is a supportive one, but that doesn't mean that they're always going to agree with you.

    One of the main challenges in any relationship is that there are almost always going to be times when you have different opinions on big decisions. It's only human, and finding a way to work as a team that benefits both of you is the best demonstration there is that you have a solid and long-lasting connection.

    Still, even the most well-established of couples can find themselves in scenarios that seem to be a no-win situation. Life has a way of throwing curveballs that only one person can catch. Compromise is a concept that most of us have to understand if we share our lives with a partner, but it is sometimes painful for everybody involved. 

    Decisions like these only become more likely when people become parents together. With children taking top priority, major life changes have to keep them in mind. Disagreements also tend to get more emotive when there are kids involved, as nobody wants to be accused of not caring about their best interests. Even with a co-parent to help, it is not easy to raise them.

     

    Author image for Ally Perry Ally Perry
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    • 01
      a female pharmacist serves a male customer, talking to him with a white box in her hand.
      via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

      The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    • One man was left feeling guilty when he put his foot down regarding his wife's career choices. She desperately wanted to be a pharmacist at Costco, and she finally had the opportunity to interview with them.

      The issue was that the hours they were offering were not convenient for spending time with her young daughter. The position was 4 PM to 9 PM Monday to Friday, and she went to daycare at 8 AM and to bed at 7 PM.

      Although the couple initially agreed that the role was not right for her, she had a further discussion with one of the staff pharmacists, convincing her to take the position. Her husband told her that he was against the idea, and she didn't take it well. He wanted to know who was in the wrong.

    • 02

      I just broke my wife’s heart. Going in I was sure it was the right move, but now not so sure

      My wife's dream is to be able to work at Costco Pharmacy (god knows why) and I supported that dream.
      via [deleted]
    • 03
      I did everything I can to help her, from polishing her resume to driving her from store to store handing out resume just have the opportunity for an interview.
      via [deleted]
    • 04
      Two months ago they finally called her and she got the job, we were thrilled but the position is an on call position with random hours.
      via [deleted]
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    • 05
      Today a part time position opened up with guaranteed stable hours but it sucks M-F 4p-9p.
      via [deleted]
    • 06
      We both agreed that it sucks because working 5hrs in CA doesn't entitle you to have a lunch break meaning she will have. to have lunch before work around 3:30p and her dinner around 9:30p.
      via [deleted]
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    • 07
      More importantly we have a 1yo, if she was to work this shift she will not be able to see our daughter until the weekends because your baby goes to daycare at 8a and she sleeps at 7p.
      via [deleted]
    • 08
      Regardless she applied for the position hoping they will have a bit of flexibility. During interview she expressed her concern about the hours and they said that they will "think about".
      via [deleted]
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    • 09
      Few days later they told here there were a lot of "great candidates" and this position requires her to work these hours.
      via [deleted]
    • 10
      a pharmacist stands with her back turned, looking at shelves of medications
      via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

      The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

    • 11
      I thought fair enough we took a shot, it didn't work out let's wait for the next opportunity.
      via [deleted]
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    • 12
      Nope.. For some unknown reason the pharmacy manager asked his staff pharmacist (who he knows is close to my wife) to talk to my wife because "is a great opportunity" so for two days. she was constantly calling and texting my wife to sell her the idea that this is a once a life time opportunity (bullsh!t) and it flipped my wife.
      via [deleted]
    • 13
      She went from "I would never take these hours and lose time with my baby" to "This is once a life time opportunity, if I don't take it I will never get this chance again" Inevitably we argued Her - "These people are so great they stood up for me and fought for me even though they have so may great candidates" Me - "Are you crazy?
      via [deleted]
    • 14
      If they have great candidates that can help them do less work why would they keep pressuring you to take it?
      via [deleted]
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    • 15
      Is because they've seen you work and they know you are also great but they know that you're inexperienced and they can bully you into working shifts that they don't want.
      via [deleted]
    • 16
      Whereas a more experienced person might come in and fight them for the earlier spots. Also A lot of people interview well but turn out to be Ahole and bad at their job, whatever candidates they have is a risk whereas you are a guaranteed.
      via [deleted]
    • 17
      If they're so nice and great to stood up go you why don't they at least offer you one of their early days.
      via [deleted]
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    • 18
      Even this is a stretch because you seem to have forgotten that we have a 1yo at home!!" Her - "You're controlling and ruining my life." I can see my wife's heart literally break during our fight but I know is the right move because if she miss our daughter growing up one day she will wish to trade everything she have to get that time back and it will be too late.
      via [deleted]
    • 19
      Even though I know this is the right decision I still feel like an Ahole
      via [deleted]
    • 20
      a baby looks up as she holds onto some banisters
      via Shot By Ireland

      The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    • 21
      LectureBasic6828 The baby doesn't need to be in childcare if your wife is starting work at 5. Realistically, your wife could be with the baby until 4 and get a babysitter to fill in the time until you get home.
      via [deleted]
    • 22
      tly95111 Original Poster's Reply If she takes this job she will be home at 9:30a and sleep prob around 1130p-1200a and if she wants to pull our daughter out of daycare she will have to sleep at midnight. Wake up at 6am take care of our daughter until 2-3p when I come home and go to work. Basically she will work 24hrs if she does this
      via [deleted]
    • 23
      AngusLynch09 It's a part time job, different hours will become available at a different time. Eating at 3:30 and 9:30 isn't the end of the world either. Does the one year old need to be in day care at 8am if your wife is home till 3:30pm? >wife's dream is to be able to work at Costco Pharmacy (god knows why) and I supported that dream. The middle brackets don't really make it sound like you support this. I'm gunna go with YTA
      via AngusLynch09
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    • 24
      Longjumping_Ant_967 YTA. How is she never going to see her kid during the week, if she's only working for 5 hrs a day? Why does the kid need day care if your wife is going to be home? She's starting a new job, she's going to have to pay her dues before she can choose a shift that works for her.
      via Longjumping_Ant_967
    • 25
      Deep PurpleDaylight If your wife wouldn't need to be at work until 4pm, why would the baby be in day care all day. That seems like a great opportunity to actually be able to be there with your baby. It makes no sense that she'd only see her on weekends. What would your wife be doing all day while the baby is in daycare if her work schedule didn't start until 4? If the baby goes to bed at 7, then your wife would realistically only miss 4 hours or less a day with the little one.
      via DeepPurpleDaylight
    • 26
      Recklessly_alive First of all I feel like this is a win win.. you guys can save on daycare because she can be home with her mom in the mornings. Second, I assume you don't work so you can be home every second with your baby so you don't miss a second of her life since this is so important. YTA.
      via Recklessly_alive
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    • 27
      Elegant Bluebird_460 YTA >but I know is the right move because if she miss our daughter growing up one day she will wish to trade everything she have to get that time back and it will be too late This is not your choice to make. Her regrets are hers and hers alone in life. You don't get to choose them for her. And this is 5 hours a day. 5 hours. That's less than most jobs. What is it you want? Her to be a SAHM? Otherwise you are just completely missing the point that this is both a great opportu
      via Elegant_Bluebird_460
    • 28
      SmallHeath555 NTA - why can't the baby stay home with your wife during the day? If this were the career opportunity to become CEO of Apple or something great. but working as a pharmacy employee at Costco? Is she a pharmacist?
      via SmallHeath555

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