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Wife demands her 60‑hour‑a‑week working husband take on even more overtime so she can have extra alone time at their 1400 square feet, two-floors home: ‘She's 39, I'm 53, [and] I give her 100% of my regular pay’

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  • Gray-haired man gazes out the window with a troubled expression, overlaid with text questioning whether he is wrong for arriving home first
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  • Am I overreacting, my wife says I should work more overtime so she has more time to herself at home.

    She works Monday to Friday from 9 to 4 as a medical assistant at a small doctor's office where she deals with patients 3 days a week (the doctor doesn't work there Thursday or Friday).
  • I work at one of the main USPS branches in the state as a VMF clerk, Monday to Thursday from 5am to 3:30pm, Friday and Saturday from 5am to 1:30pm.
  • So to me it's a what the hell sort of thing. I work way more hours, but she's mad that I'm home when she gets back and she has no alone time.
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  • I used to do Uber and was out by the time she got home. But our place is big, an apartment we just moved to, 1400 square feet, two floors, and since have always had different schedules we have different rooms.
  • Mine is on the main level and she's almost always watching shows in her room anyway.
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  • Am I really the bad guy here just because I get home first? Her commute is much longer, but that's not my fault and I work more and make more, too.
  • Cheezburger Image 10594840064
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  • On top of that I give her 100% of my regular pay, I keep the money from my overtime hours to invest for retirement.
  • I'm older than her, she's 39 in January, I'm 53 at the end of this month.
  • So as to not be a burden later on I am putting away my overtime in a 401K through USPS (TSP) which has a 5% match, I also have my pension fund, Social Security, a brokerage account, and a Roth IRA.
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  • By the time I retire if I keep this job the full 20 years I plan to I should have just over $2 million banked from the investment accounts.
  • That's another thing, maybe because she's younger, she thinks I should just put all of my pay into the monthly pile and let the chips fall where they do when I retire which would mean like $2,000 a month between Social Security and the pension fund.
  • That's not enough by a long shot. I mean I could go do Uber on my ONE day off a week, and I am going to start riding again every day after work at the trails which will put me home well after she gets back, but I don't feel like I should have to.
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  • What do you think? TL:DR I work way more than my wife and she wants me to work more so she can have more time to herself.
  • Strange_Fig_9837 NOR. Stop giving her all your pay!!! It sounds like you're being used for your money.
  • GTRacer 1972 Original Poster's Reply She puts up all of her pay, too. We pool that money, she's just better at handling paying our bills. I'm better at making money.
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  • Your_Girl9090 If the genders were reversed there would be a lot of suspicion of cheating.
  • GTRacer 1972 Original Poster's Reply She's definitely not cheating. Neither of us ever have and her sister lives with us, they're always together.
  • msawesomesauce Different rooms, different floors of the house, wants you to work more. Do you spend time together at all? Sounds like you've got a selfish room mate not a wife.
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  • GTRacer 1972 Original Poster's Reply We do need different rooms. I can sleep through construction and literal gunfire. I lived in two really sketchy cities most of my life New Haven and Bridgeport. She's from Lima, Peru which is worse, but she needs peace and quiet with total darkness. She's always hot, I'm always cold. Plus I snore and toss and turn. We used to have the same room till 2015 when the place we moved to had two huge bedrooms.
  • nolaz How is the housework split? Does the household budget allow her to max out her 401K too?
  • GTRacer 1972 Original Poster's Reply She has money in the bank, way more than I do. She has no investment accounts yet, but asked me to help her set them up. Originally she was just going to add to mine, but I told her she needs her own. As for housework, I do more of it, but I kind of like it that way because it gets done right. I do the trash, recycling, kitty litter, kitty food and water, dishes, and tidying. She does the laundry and the main bathroom when it needs doing. I'd do my own laundr
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  • happyto313 That's fucked up, you are not over reacting.
  • Tall_Elk_9421 something shifty is going on or your wife dont like spending time with you
  • Viola-Swamp You are not an ATM, OP. What is she contributing? Where does her paycheck go?
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  • NoSpankingAllowed Are you sure you're married? She sure sounds like she'd prefer to not be around you.
  • OneChange2826 NOR your wife doesn't like you. And the longer you work. And are out of the house. She can focus on her boyfriend. Your just there for your paycheck.
  • LA-forthewin Tell her to get a second job if she doesn't want to be around you. I'm not even going to ask why you're still with someone who doesn't want you around

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