Office expects intern to pay $100 for boss' "partner gift," intern doesn't know how to say he can't afford it: 'Gifts should not ever flow upwards. That is a red flag of a twisted culture at best, a toxic one at worst'

Gifts in the workplace are always a nice idea, but hard to execute in a way that makes everyone feel good. It can be tricky to know what gift to give to whom and when, and it can put some employees in an awkward spot. This is why it's best to leave the gifting up to the company. If whoever is at the top wants to pass gifts downstream, then the more the merrier. But problems arise when a coworker starts to gather up funds for something of their own creation. This is when things tend to get a little dicey.

It's never a good idea to hit up your coworkers for money, even if it's for a gift for someone else. You never know what someone else's financial reality is, even if you know how much money they make. They might be in debt, have outstanding medical expenses, or be otherwise financially responsible for others in ways that you might not be. Everyone has a different budget, and it's not anyone's business to check in on anyone else's. You certainly shouldn't expect them to have a spare $100.

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But that's what happened in this story when an intern was asked for a little more money than they were comfortable forking over. Even worse, it was for a gift for someone who assuredly makes a lot more money than they do. So they wondered if they could find a way to say no without everything going haywire.
My work expects me to contribute to a "partner gift" but I have no money.

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Commenters came in with their thoughts.

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