Woman finds herself split between 67-year-old retired dad and still-working 60-year-old mom after their move abroad turns years of simmering conflict into late-life separation: ‘They are terrible partners to each other’

Unfortunately for this 30-year-old daughter, her parents' splitting in their 60s turned into an emotional group project she never signed up for. As it turns out, late-life breakup can hit bystanders differently when it collides with retirement and relocation, and for this adult child, it ends up with watching two decent but wildly incompatible people finally admit they are done pretending this works. 

On one side sits the mother, still commuting, still carrying most of the house load, and quietly seething at a partner who is home all day yet somehow does less than he did while working. Retirement for him did not turn into shared projects or lightness, it turned into more time to stew, argue, and leave chores undone. On the other side sits the father, whose so-called golden years got stapled to a country he never really chose. His routine of decades disappeared, he never learned the language, never built a social circle, and now spends his days in a place that feels foreign, dull, and lonely.  

It is less a mystery and more a slow-motion inevitability. The mother reaches her limit and chooses separation. The father faces the likely reality of moving back to the home country, where friends and familiarity still exist, but without the child he followed. The result is a classic emotional trap for that child, pulled between two parents who were solid caregivers but mismatched partners from the start.