Student helps best friend's family with Thanksgiving prep, is unexpectedly confronted by her friend’s mom for not contributing to groceries for the "potluck-style" meal, despite never being asked to cover costs: 'Her behavior felt really inhospitable'

If you've had the same tradition for a few years, and elements change, it's important to be prepared for those changes to avoid any 'awkwardness' or confrontation. This grad student has been helping her bestie's family prep their Thanksgiving dinner for the last few years. Normally, taking responsibility for cooking a dish or two helps with prep time and efficiency. A pretty kind and generous gesture…or so she'd say!

But this year things just felt different, until she realized that her friend's parents had expected her to cover the costs of those dishes, unlike previous years. She felt uncomfortable for being left out of the "potluck" loop, but thought that her $40 fancy chocolate box should compensate for the guilt of not contributing towards groceries…So she let it go…until her friend's mother made a direct point to aggressively address the issue with her… Making her friend's home the last place she wanted to spend Thanksgiving…because it now represented anything but 'Thanks.'

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We can definitely understand the parents' frustration with feeling the need to constantly provide for another independent adult, because after all, she is a grad student now! But there is a way to go about things, and cornering and chastising your daughter's friend over a charcuterie board and a side salad is certainly not it!
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