Shoplifter conjures a half-baked excuse for stealing a charger from a convenience store, then books it when he's caught red-handed: ‘"I put them there because my hands were tired"’

You'd think that if someone were doing something illegal, they'd at least try a bit harder to be good at it.

Shoplifting is bad, as you all probably know. Yeah, shocker. "No stealing" is featured in the bible, the Ayurvedic texts, and your 2nd grader's student handbook. It's a universal sentiment that everyone should follow, but many do not. Some of you may have shoplifted before, and you probably feel guilty about it. Or, you don't. Bad to the bone, aren't you?

The point is, if you're an employee on the other side of a shoplifting scenario, you have no clue what you should do. Many retail associates are told to call the cops and let the perps get away. Night shift gas station workers probably have a crowbar and are waiting to use it on the next knuckhead who meanders in with bad karma.

The shoplifter in the story below couldn't even get out the door before an employee noticed the shoplifted item sticking out of their pocket. Their excuse? Oh, their hands were tired. Scroll to read the entire hilarious scenario.