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28-year-old bride sparks backlash after asking bridesmaid not to bring service dog to wedding: 'We don't want it in photos or in the ceremony'

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    Golden retriever wears a green "service dog" vest, in background is bride with two bridesmaids in purple on each side of her
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    'Am I the A*sh*le? [I] do not want a service dog to participate in my wedding'

    I'm (28F) am getting married in the spring. I've asked one of my best friends to be one of my bridesmaids. She has a service dog for PTSD. I respect her dog and glad
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    she has it in her life. My Fiance and I don't particularly care for dogs, and we've decided we don't want her service dog in our photos or in the ceremony.
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    When I asked her she got excited and immediately said her dog could wear something to match. the rest of the bridesmaids. Thats when I explained that the dog could
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    come to the wedding, but wouldn't be an active participant in the day. We don't want it in photos or in the ceremony. It could go to photos, but not be in them.
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    It'll be off to the side for the 10-15 minute ceremony. In preliminary discussions with our photographer we've brought this up.
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    She did not take it well. Called me an ahle and ableist and it was not a constructive conversation after the ask. She hasn't accepted my offer to be a bridesmaid, but
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    also hasn't declined formally. AITA?
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    hjo1210 I'm probably going to get down voted to h I but - I have a service dog, I was also MOH in my Bff's wedding, my service dog was sat in the front row with her
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    family during the ceremony and wasn't included in the formal pictures. It wasn't a constant thing, it was 15 minutes here and 5 minutes there. I could still see my dog and she could see me, she
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    still alerted just fine when I was feeling overwhelmed. It's not a huge ask to not have the dog be part of the ceremony. Keep the dog in the front row and off to the side during formal picks.
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    Bride needs to decide if she's willing to take the chance that there will be a meltdown because her PTSD may be triggered, friend needs to decide the same.
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    theflipping... NTA, you said you're okay with your friend having the dog at the wedding, just did not want the dog to be an active participant in the
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    wedding ceremony and photos. I feel like everyone voting yta, did not read the post fully and assumed the bride does not want the bridesmaid to bring the
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    dog AT ALL. And that is clearly not true. The bride says the dog at the wedding, to the side is fine. But to be an active participant in the wedding ceremony and the photos is not.
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    The bride doesn't want the dog on the photo, so why does she need to have photos with the dog to placate her friend? It's not her friend's wedding and it's not the friend who
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    is paying for the photos either.
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    mvmgems So many commenters lack reading comprehension. You didn't say that the service dog couldn't be present to do its job,
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    Bride in center with two bridesmaids on each side of her wearing pale lavender dresses
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    just that you didn't want it to be an active participant in the ceremony or in the photos. NTA
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  • 21
    YTA - if it was a wheelchair, would you tell her she couldn't use it? ETA - She answers the question below.

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