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    Homeowner refuses to sell fixer-upper to landlords, infuriating ex-boyfriend who wants his $5k of the deposit back: 'I want all my hard work to go to a family instead of someone's business'

    Author image for Isabella Penn
    Isabella Penn
    Oct 5, 2025 10:00 AM EDT

    Buying a first home is stressful enough, but one woman shared how her old mortgage agreement with her ex is now stirring up unnecessary drama.

    Back in her 20s, she and her then-partner bought a fixer-upper together. When the relationship ended, she bought him out of the property but agreed he'd get back the portion of his deposit  once the house was eventually sold. Fast forward eight years, she's finally ready to sell.

    The problem is that he wants the money now, and he doesn't care how she gets it.

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    • The woman explained that while she already has offers, they’re mostly from landlords looking to scoop up starter homes in the area. She’s against selling to investors, wanting instead to pass the house to another family, especially since she and her ex once struggled to find a home themselves because landlords kept buying properties out from under them.

      Her ex, however, is furious that she won’t accept a quick sale so he can get his $5k immediately. He’s been blowing up her phone and even told her parents, who gently suggested she just take the easy deal. 

      But she’s holding firm. She’s not in a rush to move, and she doesn’t want all her hard work fixing up the house to end up in the hands of a business.

    • >> PINTURAS Tropi
      via Roselyn Tirado For Unsplash+
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    • "AITA for refusing to sell my house to a landlord?"

      I bought a fixer- upper in my 20s with my now ex. I bought him out, but agreed to give him back his portion of deposit he paid upon sale whenever that may be.
      via Hideious
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    • We remained friends as we've known eachother since childhood, regardless of that I still plan to stick to my work 8 years later.
      via Hideious
    • I didn't think that needed further explanation because he knows full well how I feel about landlords buying up starter homes in lower income areas, and how strongly I felt about turning this house into a home for myself and the next occupants.
      via Hideious
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    • I told him no way, and tried to remind him of all the offers we made on starter homes that just got swept up by landlords.
      via Hideious
    • It was devastating and we almost lost all hope of getting on the property ladder. None of them wanted this one because it needed so much work.
      via Hideious
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    • If I just give him 5k now, he could still say I owe him from the sale of the house.
      via Hideious
    • I told him I was in the process of selling the house, he asked me if I had any offers and i told him yeah but from a few landlords.
      via Hideious
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    • He's absolutely furious at me for not going for a quick sale because he wants his measley 5k back now.
      via Hideious
    • He's blowing my phone up, and told my parents who are more gently telling me to just go for the easy sale but I'm in no rush to move and want all my hard work to go to a family instead of someones business.
      via Hideious
    • Cheezburger Image 10560556544
      via Tierra Mallorca For Unsplash+
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    • AITA? Edit: giving him the 5K specifically from the sale has been discussed over messages many times in the past.
      via Hideious
    • Getting him out was a nightmare as he can be pretty nasty. Most of the time he's fine but he suddenly switches and "goes to war" with people.
      via Hideious
    • ObiYawnKenobi > If I just give him 5k now, he could still say I owe him from the sale of the house. Not if he signs a release in exchange for the $5k.
      via ObiYawnKenobi
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    • This-Firefighter8673 NTA. You don't owe a landlord a sale, and you don't owe your ex instant cash. You're selling responsibly and sticking to your values, nothing wrong with that.
      via This-Firefighter8673
    • Band-Aid-Juice I'd just pay him the $5k now and remove him from the equation.
      via Band-Aid-Juice
    • Infinite-Cat-Peep NTA. He's waited this long, he can wait another month or two. Even in this market, that's all it will take for a starter home.
      via Infinite-Cat-Peep
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    • indred72 NTA - You agreed to pay him back the deposit after you bought him out. It doesn't matter where the money comes from. If you don't want to sell to a landlord, that's none of his business.
      via indred72
    • Quiet_Village_1425 Listen. Is he still on the deed?? If not take out a home equity loan and give him his 5k. Document it in writing when you hand it over. Be done with him!
      via Quiet_Village_1425
    • fargo-utah NTA. Never sell to a landlord and especially not to an agency that wants to rent it out at a high markup
      via fargo-utah
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    • Kindly-Push-3460 He lost all rights on deciding who to sell to when you bought him out. Ignore him, and do what is right for you.
      via Kindly-Push-3460

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    Tags

    boyfriend fixer upper landlord drama house homeowner ex relationships girlfriend entitled people karma mortgage deposit family
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