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Woman is accused of disrespecting boyfriend after he demands she no longer have long chats with her ex-husband inside his house, despite having a healthy co-parenting relationship, tension rises when she refuses: 'It is always about the kids'

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    Woman sitting in a convertible
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    AITA for going inside my Ex’s house?

    I (37F) was married to my ex- husband (42M) for 16 years. We got married really young, and we have two kids (7 and 11).
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    We divorced about a year and a half ago, and honestly, we get along better now than we ever did married. Our co- parenting relationship is really solid.
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    He still lives in the house we bought together, and I have my own place. We split custody 50/50.
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    Here's the part that's causing drama: I regularly go inside his house when I'm picking up or dropping off the kids. Sometimes it's just to grab something they forgot for school,
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    sometimes it's because they're not ready yet, and sometimes it's just to talk for a bit about issues going on with the kids, school, etc. It is literally always about the kids.
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    There are zero romantic feelings there (he even has a girlfriend), and for both of us, it just feels natural and easy.
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    The issue is with my new boyfriend. We've been dating a couple months, and he says it's super uncomfortable for him that I go into my ex's house at all.
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    He thinks I should just wait in the driveway, garage, or car, and only talk to my ex when it's strictly about the kids.
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    He feels it's "disrespectful" for me to spend time in there and have long conversations with my ex.
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    Man and a woman talking while sitting on a couch
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    From my perspective, we're co-parents, we're friends, and being on good terms makes life better for the kids.
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    But my boyfriend clearly feels strongly about it. I think I should be able to go inside the house without it being a huge deal.
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    AITA for going into my ex's house and keeping a close co- parenting relationship?
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    Impossible_Rain_4727 NTA: If your boyfriend is uncomfortable that you have a healthy, friendly co- parenting relationship, he is not the guy for you.
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    kslmp63 NTA and you might want to look for a new boyfriend. This jealous this early in a relationship is a huge no in my opinion.
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    True-Presentation726 The new boyfriend won't last. He doesn't. understand, and will never understand your solid relationship with your ex. And at two months he's already trying to alienate you from the ex. Just no.
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    Don't let this new guy ruin your great co- parenting friendship. If only all ex's were able to do it as well as you do with your ex. Your kids are hugely benefitting from your mature relationship with your ex. Your new boyfriend's insecurities will ruin the status quo if you even give him an inch. He's not mature enough to date you. NTA
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    capn_ginger NTA, but this is a big red flag. "Disrespectful" implies that you're the property of your bf, and that his property rights are not being respected. "Disrespectful" is not a word one would use to describe the behavior of a whole human person with agency and relationships outside of current dating who has done literally nothing wrong.
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    Parents waving goodbye to their young daughter
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    the_booktender NTA. Your bf just threw up a red flag. Waiting outside would be fine if there was a problem between you two, but it does not sound like that is the case. And that is great. It is also between you and your ex. This bf does not get a say in how you and your ex do what is best for your children. Kind of a red flag.
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    BlondDee1970 NTA and ditch the new boyfriend. You're going to have the rest of your life at events with your ex with the kids - you do not need a jealous or controlling partner who can't get along with everyone.
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    Donutsmell NTA. If your boyfriend can't accept you being on friendly terms with the father of your children, then the boyfriend has to go.
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    No-Foundation-4118 See those giant red flags now before he gets any worse. That is super controlling especially considering how short of a time you have been dating.
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    05730 You mean ex boyfriend. Your ex boyfriend is threatened by your ex husband.
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    keesouth NTA. Get rid of this BF. He needs to understand that getting along with the person you co-parent with is important. If he's so insecure that he can't handle that he needs to move on. It will only get worse.

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