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I used to dread family events when I was a kid. Not because my extended family was terrible (though let's be real - there's something wrong with every extended family), but because weddings in particular were confusing and kind of torture. Some cousin, aunt, or distant-relative-you-don't-know-the-name-of-but-your-parents-do would find "the love of their life," and suddenly I'd be shoved into the most uncomfortable clothes I had ever worn. I was warned not to spill anything on them, which of course made me spill things almost immediately.
And then came the weird food and awkward conversations. My dad dancing. My mom bragging about my "academic achievements" that were 90 percent fiction. My brother piling his plate with whatever monstrosity the caterer thought was classy (blue drinks, swan-shaped watermelons - why was this a thing?).
But here's the truth: every 80s wedding was basically the same. Puffy dresses, shiny tuxes, identical ceremonies, the same buffet tables. Looking back, it's like they were all following one official "wedding starter pack." These photos are proof.