31-year-old divorced mom of a 9 and 11-year-old refuses to meet with ex-husbands 2nd wife who wants to usurp her as the mother figure in her children's lives: 'They told me to get used to hearing her called mom because they would not stop it.'

I will never understand stepmothers who want to overthrow the mother of their stepchildren as the primary maternal figure in their lives. It's one thing if a kid does not have a mother who is alive or an active part of their lives, and even then, it's best to tread with caution. When a kid fully has a mother who loves them, is involved in their lives, and serves as the primary parental figure to them, it is crazy to think that you could overthrow that just because you're dating their dad. It's great to have a good relationship with your stepchildren, and if they decide that they want to call you "stepmom" or "bonus mom," more power to them. But in 99% of the cases, there is no way that a stepmother will become more important to them than their mom. There's nothing wrong with being a secondary parental figure.

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The stepmom in this story faces more challenges than just wanting to bond with her stepkids. She wanted to have kids with her husband and make his kids like her more than their mom, but her infertility made that plan moot.
AITA for ignoring my ex's request for a sit down talk between him, his wife and me?

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