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Oh, you still collect Pokémon cards? That's… adorable. Meanwhile, I've moved on to something a bit more… refined. Ever heard of Victorian trade cards? No? I didn't think so. They were all the rage in the late 1800s - you know, back when people still had taste. These weren't mass-produced by some multinational conglomerate. These were tiny masterpieces of chromolithography, distributed by candlelight to promote essential life-sustaining goods like… meat paste.
Each card is a portal to a time when advertising meant putting a cat in a bonnet and sending it on a sleigh ride to promote beef extract. When a man in tights arriving on a swan boat meant something. And unlike your shiny modern cards that smell like laminate and disappointment, these were printed on cardstock so thick you could build a house with it.
Sure, you can keep chasing your holographic dragons, but I prefer my collectibles with a touch of mystery, a faint scent of dust, and absolutely no QR codes. Welcome to the velvet-rope world of Victorian trade cards. We don't just trade - we curate history, darling.