Hallmark movies are awesome. They're hilariously, reliably formulaic. They have stilted acting and even more stilted dialogue. They have names like "The Other Christmas Wife" or "Winter Is For Loving, and Christmas." They're my favorite thing to watch when I'm in a hotel room. Nothing hits like a terrible movie and a room service BLT. My mom and I play a game we invented whenever we watch Hallmark movies together: we pause it 15 minutes in and each take a turn saying what we think is going to happen in the rest of the movie. Whoever gets it closest wins. It's remarkable how close we both get every time.
That said, if I could only watch Hallmark movies for the rest of my life, I'd be pretty upset. But that's what one husband wanted to banish his wife to, after deciding that her constant questions about other, more complex movies were too much to bear. Read on for the story.
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