We have a secret… but we're going to tell you. You have to promise you won't tell anyone, OK? So… we're hiding three raccoons in the office. We raise them as if they were office dogs, just in secret.
There is Remus the Reserved, he's the raccoon that lives inside the kitchen trash. He's shy and doesn't like to go out of his trash home, but every food leftover that's thrown inside nourishes him. Then there's Ronda the Ruckus, she lives in the AC vents above the boss' office. Every time she decides to take a walk the boss thinks the office above is doing renovations again. And lastly, there's Ronald the Rambancteous, he's tiny and runs from shadow to shadow, biting the ankles of unsuspecting employees, and runs again to hide before they notice him.
Please help us keep the secret hidden, so we can keep our office raccoons. We love them.
WANT MORE LAUGHS? SUBSCRIBE TO OUR NEWSLETTER FOR WEEKLY CATURDAY COMEDY AND MEMES GALORE!
We asked around in the office, and the women agreed: they want a raccoon wedding. Dress code: trash. Food: trash. Raccoons: welcome, even if they come inside a trash. Invite everyone.
We. Need. This. Tutorial. All we have ever wanted is to be raccoons, and if there's a detailed tutorial on how to do that, we want it. We already live in trash, so we got that covered.
Check out our Instagram for more hilarious animal content!
Love our stuff? Shop for some of our pawsome merch here.