"I'm really tired of the idea that parents are somehow obligated to just take endless meanness, neglect, and general nastiness from their teenage/adult children…"
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Life is messy, and so are relationships. Some would say that relationships are the main reason life is messy. But is also the reason it is beautiful, so we keep having them. Family relationships, romantic relationships, new relationships, whatever it is, there are always ups and downs. In the case of Redditor u/Maleficent-Fix-7424 things got extra messy.
This guy's wife cheated on him with his brother when their son was only 3 years old. She ended up leaving him and marrying his brother. This guy is also on the road a lot because he is a professional truck driver, so when he got replaced in the family dynamic by his own brother, things went even more downhill. Now, his son was calling his brother “dad” and he wasn't only left by his wife by his brother, but now his brother replaced him as his kid's father. Obviously, he went into a very dark place and hit the big sad pretty hard. Until he met his new wife and life started to have meaning for him again.
His son never really cared for him and now at almost 18 years old, he made it very clear that he considers this Redditor's brother, aka the man who stole his wife, his actual father. So when he asked his bio-dad to come to an event after making it clear that he asked everyone else first and they couldn't make it, his bio-dad said no. He already had plans with his new wife and couldn't cancel. So his son, in an adolescent rage, accused him of loving his new wife more than him. His bio-dad thought about it and he did, so he told him. Was that a big mistake for a father or was the son old enough to hear such harsh words when he had said the same thing to his bio-dad about him vs his step-dad so many times before? See the full story and discussion below.
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