Often in life, if you hold on to things too tight and try to perfect the situation—trying to please everybody—you're going to end up pleasing nobody. Especially if, you're so obsessed with your own thoughts and ideals that you forget to actually even listen to what everyone else is telling you would make them happy and what their preferences are. At that point, you need to be honest with yourself… Are you really trying to make things work for everybody? Or is it really all just about you?
That's the situation that this mother found herself in. You can see where her intentions might have been good but, at the same time, she was prioritizing her ideal of a perfect family dinner together over what everyone else actually wanted. For this reason, combined with the fact that it was her daughter's birthday, readers ultimately felt that she was in the wrong for her actions here.