When millennials all turned thirty, they were under the impression that it would be exactly like the 2004 banger, 13 Going On 30. They were all planning on being trendy, hot, and Jennifer Garner when they grew up, but instead of being thirty, flirty, and thriving, elder millennials are just thirty, dirty and shriveling. At this point, every millennial is nostalgic for the olden days when the Gameboy color was making boring Pokemon games that we could play with our friends or the simpler times when we'd wake up on Saturday morning and watch VH1's top 40 music videos. Life was good back when we weren't adulting every second.